mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I like reading your articles keep it up. I have a problem if I can call it that. I recently experienced my first kiss with a girl and I really liked it. It got me worried thinking I was a lesbo or turning into one but at the same time I can’t get it off my mind, she really knew how to kiss me and when she held my breast the thrill felt so good. We exchanged numbers and now she wants to meet me for coffee, I’m so tempted and can’t get her off my mind.

I am 26, I have a husband. We have been married for just over a year, no kids, we dated for 3 years prior to our marriage. Until now I was as faithful as can be and it all happened so fast I was clubbing with my pals and met this girl who cornered me and we kissed. I had a few drinks but I won’t blame the drink because I knew what I was doing. Was this a fantasy that I was not consciously aware of or will it pass and I’ll forget the whole thing? I am so confused, should I tell my husband and if I do I know we will be done.

Maurice’s reply:

My dear thanks for putting me on the spot because it’s not really my place to tell you what the right thing is, because you already know. I do advocate for people to explore their fantasies and sexuality but preferably with their partners in the picture but that is not always possible as in your case.

I hear you and boy do I feel your predicament but you need to reflect back to what led you to stray, is everything at home fine, could your actions have been triggered by an event or events that have taken their toll in your marriage? It’s only been a year in your marriage so are you in-love with your husband? These are the questions you need to ask yourself sincerely placing your happiness first. The other side of the coin is easier to interpret and it could be a moment of lust that was well planned by the women you kissed. Let me in brief explain that the reason why she made you feel the way you did, it’s a mixture of two things. Women who know the way around a woman’s body out do most men ‘any day’ and the taste of the forbidden fruit comes into play on a psychological level as well.

If in the next one week you still feel like meeting this woman then you need to contact me and we can take it from there. Whatever you do within the next 7 days don’t meet her otherwise she might take you to ‘places sexually’ that I won’t be able to reverse and don’t tell your husband for now. Your eventual fate will be determined later. In short refrain from kissing any more women!

Dear Maurice,

I am a 38 year old guy who can’t get enough from women. Women like me for some reason of which I know anyway so let me not bullshit you, they love my skills in bed period. I know people say that those who say they are good in bed are usually bad but I stand to be corrected and so far I have never had complaints from women. 

I’m under so much pressure from family (mother especially) to get married but I just can’t commit to one woman so why bother if I’m only going to hurt someone in the long run through adultery. Most of the women I meet are very committed to their boyfriend or husband although they are equally committed to my between the sheets ventures. These women range from 24 to 45, they are independent and considering I don’t possess the cash they are used to spending they make it very clear that I’m just their ‘play mate’ and I’m very OK with that. My concern is an incident where I went out with one of my women only to bump into another who was with her husband at the time. We all said our hellos and everyone went their way. Now my date created a bit of a scene at our table as we were in a social place. She was apparently jealous of my life style of seeing different women. I am not a therapist but I am certain she only got mad because the other woman was younger and fly. That’s what I think. I am extremely open with all women that I date. I must admit I am blessed to meet such up market women who dress and smell like a million dollars. They all know they share me with other women just as I know that they all go back to their men. So where is the problem? By the way I would like your dvd on how to make a woman squirt I think that is the only skill I lack. How much is the dvd? I hear you give private lessons on squirting is this true?

Maurice’s reply:

My good man my first comment is the obvious; at least you are not willing to get married for the wrong reasons to end up hurting someone. I can’t judge your life style because none of the women you date are being forced to date you. You are all consenting adults and life goes on. Your unfortunate scene may have been evoked by what you suspect however it’s important to remember that first, women are competitive in many ways and second, sooner or later whether you agree on having a fling and nothing more than a casual thing, women eventually get attached to a man, the degree varies, but there is always some level of attachment. For men your life style is like a sport, you have a choice of players to play with and I can only imagine how many men reading this now are thinking “lucky bastard”. Just be safe while playing this game I know you get my drift.

Yes I do give private sessions; to squirt is the mother of all orgasms if a woman learns to embraces the build up to the sensation that makes her squirt. I personally believe all women should experience this feeling. From one dude to another, you realise that squirting can not be faked because it’s a gushing of water from the vagina, isn’t that just thrilling, compared to the usual after sex scenario where many men ask themselves quietly ‘I hope she came’. I call it the ego crashing syndrome. Inbox me and let’s talk about you getting the DvD.

Dear Maurice,

I have been married for 14 years, I got married when I was 26 and my wife was 24. For the last 14 years I have done nothing but be a good husband and provide for my family.

We have two kids who are both in boarding school so my wife and I get to have quality time or should I say used to have quality time. Things in my opinion changed about a year ago when she suddenly gained her own life, she started to exclude me from her day to day activities and it moved on to her going on short breaks alone I assume, don’t get me wrong we have always made time for ourselves to give each other space and as they say the heart grows fonder. Maurice I felt alone for such a long while until I confronted the matter with her a week ago and she shocked me with her testimonial, if I may call it that. She claims that after our four year of marriage I became too predictable and what hurt me most was to hear her say that our sex life has never ‘taken her there’ I believe as men we both know what she means. I am in a stalemate; she has bruised my ego, my manhood completely and I have no idea where the marriage is going. Is there a marriage to salvage?

Maurice replies,

Despite your unfortunate predicament it sounds like you are contemplating leaving or are those just emotions getting the better of you?

He says,

To be frank I have dedicated my life to my wife and looking back I had many opportunities to cheat on her to satisfy my own cheap thrills but I honesty thought our marriage was next to perfect. Can you believe I have never come home later than 7pm and I always kept her updated of my movements, isn’t that what women look for in a man, a man who loves to go home to his wife or did I misunderstand my vows to her? Fourteen years is a long time to throw it all a way but what option do I have, I can’t live in the same home with my wife as if we were housemates and we are somewhat in that situation.

Maurice replies,

Have you asked her if there’s more to this than you being predicable and does she still love you?

He says,

I am even embarrassed to say it but she did say that she still loves me but as a friend she can’t see me as a sexual partner anymore and she made it very clear that if she chooses to see someone else I will be the first to know. Seriously, what is wrong with humanity, what do women want, you give your life to one woman and you get the same treatment as a man who cheats or worse. Right now I am fearful for our kids. I fear separation will affect them I don’t even want to think about it. Maurice what do you advise I do, be honest do you see this marriage going back to what it once was? Can she change her mind and see that she is making the biggest mistake of her life?

Maurice replies,

In my professional opinion your wife is either going through a phase of some kind of mid life crisis or she wants out of the marriage. However without having a session with the both of you this is mere speculation and I would hate to categories your relationship status based on scenario probabilities. What is clear is that for the last 10 years your wife has harboured negative energy and like a volcano she has finally erupted and now here you are in this dilemma. There’s a logical reason why couples seek counseling and I highly recommend that we go down that avenue to attempt to resolve this by finding out what is really eating her up. I know you are hurting, but it would be productive to hear both sides of the story so we have a set foundation to more forward.

Dear Maurice,

I am a 42 year old woman with a 48 year old hubby. We have been married for 17 years almost 18 and yes we have had our ups and downs like any other marriage but by the time my hubby was 42 his sexual hunger had declined, at first I thought he had another but later found out it was a physical thing on his part after he visited a clinic. He just could not get it up and it was frustrating for both of us but selfishly I was only thinking of my needs which to be honest needed some urgent attention. Anyway I was reading up on how to improve a man’s erection and many of the sites were just selling products that I was not ready to try out and how would I even bring up the topic of him swallowing some random pills. Saying that though I one day went up to my him and just let it out, I had found the answer to our problem though I could not believe I was going to propose it, I asked him if he was open to me hiring a stripper to give us a private dance at the privacy of our home. Shockingly he declined the offer stating we were too old to start exploring such adolescent behaviour but I was not ready to take no for an answer so I just tricked him with a notion of a romantic dinner and I gave our house help an off that night.

He was out till 7pm, when he got home I served him and he served me, he always had that gentleman touch, I guess that’s the reason why I still Love him, anyway after the meal my ‘q’ was “baby what would you want for dessert” at the precise moment I unveiled what I was wearing under my ‘normal’ dress and it was a very dark red bikini outfit and his eyes just opened up… for a minute I thought he was going to have a heart attack and to add to the blend a very hot stripper who I had personally picked from a line up ‘somewhere’ appeared and gave me a lap dance.

My hubby to describe it was simply gob smacked he did not utter a word he just sat there watching as this hot young girl ‘if I may really stress she was hot’ played around with me touching me in places I never knew would get me to scream (at my age). At this point the stripper had lured me to the sitting room, hubby was still sat at the dining area which was a few metres away still not saying anything but I could see a change in his eyes, he was getting turned on, the stripper then majestically cat walked towards him and took his hand and brought him closer and as he watched she, in her own sexy way, whispered “join us”. My hubby was a bit shy but he came over and she told him to kiss me then she also kissed me and that went on for about 15 minutes and before you knew it I was naked and so was my hubby. Maurice he had the most solid hard-on I had ever witnessed him have unless it had been so long I had forgotten his manhood abilities. We had what I can call the most thrilling, exciting, exhilarating experience ever, I could literally feel my heart and his beating and the rush was overwhelming, I even had what I can only say were multiple orgasms. I mean no amount of words can describe that night.

My question to you is, it has now been 2 months since that night and for some reason we want to experience it again, is it wise, and is it addictive to the point where one of us will not be able to sexually function without it? We equally want it and I’m not at all threatened by having a stranger in our home because I had the last stripper tested before she came over we went together and I paid for the full package. The other thing is that I noticed that my hubby was turned on more when the stripper played with me and as a woman even though it was my idea it was a great feeling to know that she was not the main attraction on the night. Is this my husband’s fantasy that has come to reality after all these years? If it is I’m fine with it because our sex life has improved immensely.

Maurice’s reply:

I must admit your story makes feel there is hope for so many relationships out there, they just need to open up to the endless possibilities of igniting their connection in one way or another. I want you to know that you are a very special woman I say this because you were willing to explore unknown domains of sexuality in ways that unfortunately most of society would regard as immoral as if morals are the foundation of our society today!

Considering your sex life was re-ignited by this experience I personally do not see a problem with the occasional naughty night with a stripper. I can only caution that ‘yes’ it can be addictive and became a fundamental requirement to stimulate you and your husband which is not bad until one of you feels that without the stripper there’s no fire and that can create a rift between you. However to add to your visually induced stimulus I recommend that you acquire adult themed videos that you can now and again pop into the DvD and trust me most of the time you will only manage to watch 10 minutes if that before you get aroused and you turn on each other with that lust filled atmosphere. It’s like a room engulfed by gas then you light a match! With your husband having this fetish for girl on girl action a good DvD will soon replace the need for an actual third party to be present, it will also be easier on your pocket, sex is great but lets limit your expense to gain satisfactory sexual desires.

Would you say that your communication has improved since your erotic night?

She replied: Maurice it has tremendously

Maurice’s reply:

That’s super. Now you can find out more about one another I wouldn’t be surprised that your husband for instance has other desires, other fetishes that he hasn’t told you about.

She replied:

Maurice I hope one of his desires is to take me up the rear, it sounds weird for a woman my age but I’m feeling so sexually liberated that I’m willing to explore many things some I can’t even tell you right now maybe later.

Maurice’s reply:

Hold your horses there my dear. Give your husband time to digest the numerous sexual acts you have embarked on already unless you have already hinted to him! If you do experiment ‘taking it from behind’ make sure you have a lot of lubrication also make sure that you take your time to ‘de-virgin’ that new area just as you did your vagina. For some women the best position is missionary but with your legs pulled back as close to your head as possible (maintaining comfort though) or doggy style at the edge of your bed with him standing and your body from the waist tilted forward and your ass spread out. Last but not least your hubby will most probably love the new tight feel, especially if his penis has a good sized girth that you feel at entry. To start with your hubby must thrust slowly, if anything you should at ‘ever inch’ tell him how you are feeling so that you establish a comfortable thrust phase and rhythm. This will increase the sensations that may lead to orgasm. Many women have achieved the great ‘O’ from anal sex some have even squirted due to the penis head girth rubbing the G-Spot.

I do hope you continue to explore your sexuality and maintain a healthy communication link and do keep me posted it has been a pleasure to share with you.

Dear Maurice,

I don’t know how you can help but I am in a dark lonely place and I need to get out of this place but I don’t know how. I have been married for 19 years, got wed when we were both 18 years old. I make a very good living with my business, it was a blessing in my youthful years, we live in a upper class estate and I give my family everything they need even though my wife too works I provide everything as I want to do so.

My problem is that for the last 7 years if I approximate I am sure that my wife fakes her orgasms and at first I didn’t really care as long as I got my share of pleasure but it started to affect me and instead of confronting the issue with her I opted to date other women who would constantly praise me through my ability to pamper them with gifts, residential bills, holidays out of the country and even cars. I must admit that these women who are five in number have over the years really boosted my ego even when at home things were not so good I always had these women to make me feel like a man. Sooner or later I realised that I was in the same predicament with a few of the women, not satisfying them in bed although my urge for sex was higher with them than with my wife. She is not aware of my ‘playing away’ antics and if she is she is doing a good job of pretending because we still are intimate but once only in awhile when we are both under the influence of alcohol. I feel like my playing away ways have now become an addiction and seeking praise from random women who I seem to attract is the order of my life. I love my wife and honestly if she has also been cheating on me I deserve it but can I revive our marriage, our communication, our love?

Maurice’s reply:

First things first let’s get it out of the way that there is no excuse for cheating, however that said, there is a male driving force that has to be satisfied at all costs, that primal instinct to mate. This is the male thirst for the opposite sex and it involves ‘ego boosting’ through soothing words from a woman and especially in your case with the thoughts of you not being man enough in the bedroom must be hard. Please understand that I am not at all supporting your cheating option but confirming that for men the ‘ego’ is one area that constantly needs to be soothed with words from a woman to affirm your manhood. Does it improve your bedroom skills? The answer is ‘no it does not’ but as long as a man’s ego is elevated by whatever influence he will do his best to return to the source that provides this manhood feeling, it’s a form of positive appraisal and is key to a man’s mental stability in a relationship.

Old habits die hard and there is no particular formula that will give this situation a quick fix. I recommend that you do not tell your wife about the affairs in case you were planning to do so. I do not see that as a remedy. They say ‘the truth will set you free’ however this situation will mostly likely set your marriage ablaze and that we need to avoid otherwise you will not salvage your relationship. There may come a time when if you accomplish to regain your communication and candid talk between you, you can tell her about your indiscretions but for now we are not yet there and it might not be an option only time as I mentor both of you will tell.

I want us to meet so that we can have a one on one and address the a few issues and I will also be able to evaluate your honesty based on my questions on the day we meet. In short why embark on a journey to rekindle your love with you wife if during the process your side kicks will still be part of your life, I’m not judging you I’m only stating a possibility. I have dealt with couples and not all have 100% solid intentions to renew their love. Considering you have had multiple affairs I can not take your word on this particular key element so I need for you to get yourself tested for any STDs. If you are willing to do so then I am able to monitor over a period of time and assist in improving your current marriage status. Are you willing to get tested?

He replied: Yes I am willing to do anything to regain my bond with my wife like we once had.

Maurice’s reply:

Then I believe we are on the right path. Once we know your STD status it will determine the direction to take but first one step at a time. I look forward to meeting you, please do call me so we can arrange a suitable date to meet.