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Dear Maurice,

I hope you are good. I decided to contact you after the Whatsapp session we had with my group last week. It was very informative and quite the eye opener. Oh, I must mention that at first we were very skeptical about inviting you to our Whatsapp because most of the men thought you were fake, actually if it wasn’t for the female vote who were in fullblackmanthinking support of you the session would not have taken place. But once you commenced with your voice notes and you spoke a lot sense you suddenly became the best speaker we have ever had in our forum. Some of your previous haters are not your biggest fans, it was a job well done. Now, I have an issue that I could not share in the group though I did ask a few questions and I appreciated your responses. I am 32 and a self made successful software developer. For 3 years I have been dating my soul mate. I could marry her tomorrow but I am so afraid to give her my love. Truth be told 4/5 years ago I was a womanizer but since meeting her, life shifted for me. I fell in-love and her sex is off the hook, it feels great to be with her. But even though she professes to love me I don’t think she is ready to be fully mine.

Maurice asks,

Why would you doubt her?

He replies,blackwomantexting

She is constantly on her phone, especially at night, chatting, chatting and more chatting. I even tested her concentration span towards me over a period of 9 months and she has failed miserably. How do you text people when out on a diner date. I would expect conversation but all I get is divided attention. I got tired of fussing and now I pretend I am ok but I am not. She also jumps at any out of town plan without a thought of what I think. I have never given her conditions, I don’t support regimental attitudes but there is only so much a man can take.

Maurice replies,

I need to ask. Has she ever been different in the 3 years? How old is she and what does she do for a living if at all?

He replies,blackcoupleplayinginbed

For the first 2 years we were not living together but for the last year I have seen a side of her that I can’t handle. She is 28 and she works as a restaurant manager. She has been in hospitality for the last 4 years. She works crazy hours at times so when we are together I expect her to catch up with me not social media. I miss the way we would fool around in bed and just consume each other in our own bubble. Am I being unreasonable?

Maurice replies,

You are not being unreasonable. However, when you started dating, was it just fun and more fun without future expectations? I ask because I sense that she may not have had long term focus in your relationship. This has nothing to do with her loving you, love is just a psychological condition which does not guarantee mutual future goals or possibilities. One can love someone for particular reasons that don’t have any connection with relationship advancement like marriage. That does not mean one loves you less, it just means that your journey may not be towards the same destination.

He replies,

Okay, wow. I did not look at it that way. So what does that mean for me?

Maurice replies,

Can you say that you and her are close friends, apart from having fun that is sexually influenced, would you confidently say you that you cuddle up to each other and feel like the World would end without each other, do you share a closeness that redefines logic,blackcoupleinabubble do you have laughs that leave your ribs hurting, do you go out socializing and instead of allowing your environment to control you you stay united and embrace each moment together, do you sometimes feel like you breath the same air, yours is uncontaminated and pure? If none of the above resonates with your relationship attributes then my friend, your relationship was most likely formed on a weak foundation. Loving someone is sweet and intoxicating, you can even taste it in your mouth but the problem is, that sweetness is not replicated in her mouth for you to share in the delights. She is most likely enjoying the tidal wave not knowing that in the horizon you seek to find calmer shores where you can settle with her.

My professor once told me that love is extremely dangerous because loving someone only guarantees how you feel and that there is no way of measuring another human being’s love for you not unless you are shallow enough to perceive love by material things you gain.

Does that make sense?

He replies,

Boss, you are good. I really love this woman but as I was reading your sentiments it hit me that you have more or less described my relationship.

Maurice replies,

I am not good but thank you. I have just witnessed this scenarios for a long time and I make my deductions based on information shared. Human behaviour is pretty predictable if you understand the variables involved. If I may, when you met her, what were the striking things about her? And please I know you are in love but don’t sell me some lovey dovey story because you did not know her when you made your move.

He replies,

Hahaha… mate she was fly as fuck. She has this coke bottle figure and for sure I wanted to tap that ass. We got acquainted and at some point my mission was accomplished. I had no plans to continue contact but after a few outings I got to know her and enjoy showing her off and here we are years later.

Maurice replies,

You have just described how 95% of men view there initial contact with a woman they end up marrying. It is always good to accept your initial intent as a man, other things just develop as a bonus to the male lust factor. The irony if I may call it that, is that you are now the one in your relationship who can’t get enough of her.

He replies,

So there is no future with her?

Maurice replies,

I did not say there is no future with her. Even if you left her because you were in a hurry to marry, you have likely odds that you might meet someone who’s compatibility is much worse. The pastures are not always greener. I can tell you that despite your current in-love feelings for her, once you marry her, her newly acquired title of wife can easily change your perception of her, instantaneously you can go from the man who could not breath without her to a man who takes her for granted every day because you suddenly view her as your property and not as your soul mate. It happens to a majority pool of men. One day you were the King of love and the next day you are that guy who disappears like Kalonzo or comes home at 4am smelling of another woman.

From one man to another, I know us men pretty well. Love is great but it’s not enough to keep you interested once you begin to feel you own her, you need to understand that your love right now is fueled by your lust factor. You need to nurture and keep alive the side of you that looks at her as your hot coca cola bottle woman/girl. If you don’t that intoxicating flame will be extinguished by a sudden shift of psychology when you picture her as your wife and future mother of your children. My good man, all this love you have will disappear and you might notice any change until its too late. Too many couples fall under that sequence of events and it’s not necessary. If marriage happens for you and her let it be a bonus. It should never be the deciding factor of whether you are going to be together or not. In short, I do not want to save your relationship in the future, I would rather hear you tell me that you found an equilibrium and that you still happily together 10 years from now than hearing that you got married only to experience 10 years of misery. The ball is in your court.

He replies,

Hahaha ati Kalonzo. I hear you bro. What can I say, it has been enlightening and I will apply your knowledge. I agree, I don’t need to be married to quantify my happiness, that makes a lot of sense. I think you need to talk to my boys, out of 7 of them non is faithful and they find me weak when I share my love stories. Thank you. I will keep you in the loop if you don’t mind?

Maurice replies,

You are welcome. Please do . My goal is to keep your relationship flame burning with you making the right choices. Like I said, 95% of men behaviour and think like your boys. Its funny how it is forbidden in many male forums to admit you can love a woman and yet about 50% of those 95% are like a little poddle in their homes.

He replies,

True that, cheers bro.


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I ventured out….

Dear Matheka,

Happy New Year. I hope you are keeping well since our session in November. I recall you asking for feedback so here goes. Firstly, I would like to thank you for the eye opening candid chat we had during our session. It was depressing to have you confirm a few things about my marriage but I guess I always knew but lived in denial for manyebonyfamily years. Secondly, apart from my sexual life, which I will go into, I am thankful for the information you shared which hit home in relation to my marriage. My husband and I had a serious talk where we looked at our viable options and we recently decided not to get a divorce but live together as friends. Frankly, a divorce would be too expensive and we feel our kids still need both of us to live under one roof. Even though my husband refused to attend our initial consult session he agreed with 80% of what you shared with me. We have a guest wing and that is where he will be living and we shall review that status after 2 years. Our discussion also touched on the sensitive matter of dating other people and we came to a mutual agreement. We have a transition to adapt to but I am confident that the harmony you spoke about will be achieved.

Now to my sex life. I have consistently followed your program on a daily basis and I must admit true to your word you have transformed my womanhood. Like I said when we first met, I thought squirting and even multiple orgasms was a myth but I guess when you are dealing with the maestro himself aka vagina whisperer, you can’t fail. I also discovered what you meant when you told me that my vagina does not respond to social ebonypussylickingdefined labels but responds to a stimulus which contradicted what we are taught by society, that you will only enjoy sex with the man you love. Your stimulus theory has been confirmed repeatedly because despite loving him and thinking of him as my ultimate man, sex with my husband was nothing but obligational and has been for years. Then a week into our session I applied what you taught me with some other guy and the water works were in full display. He even commented ‘your husband doesn’t appreciate this’, I had to tell him that it had never happened with any other man. You should have seen the pride in his face, as if he had conquered the World. Just as instructed I told him to patiently alternate between licking my urethra zone and my clit. I felt the build up and he told me to let go. I splashed on his face. He got up with this mighty look on his face totally convinced he could move Mountains and like you recommended I gave him the credit. Oh, before I forget, I ventured out and tried out myebonybisexual fantasy with a woman and I love it. It was by far the most sensual sex I have ever experienced. All in all my sex life and over all outlook on life has changed. As you well noted, one of my main issues was that I was a stickler for societal rules and morals. I have since learnt to be more flexible in my day to day life. I have also learnt to find happiness within myself instead of relying on external love and affirmation. I believe that the work you do is critical in changing mindsets and giving people direction in their relationships. Many of us are sold into the Disney version of marriage ‘happily ever after’ and to be perfectly honest, if I could turn back time, I would never have rushed for a marital status that would become my source of misery for 8 years out of 9. Anyway enough with memory lane, I will now only focus on the things that bring me joy and Matheka you have bought me a lot of joy and I will be forever indebted to you. I have asked a friend of mine to see pronto, she is also a member of the denial club and I know she will benefit from your session(s). God bless you and have a marvelous 2018.

ps: when I googled you and saw you rate card I thought you were too affordable considering the value you offer. I think you should charge a premium rate, after all what value do people put on their relationship. Having been a participant of an extravagant wedding, I now believe people spend unnecessary amounts, hundreds of thousands, millions on their wedding day. So they should equally want to pay premium to sustain their relationship. Food for thought.

Maurice replies,

Thank you so much for the feedback. The above is what keeps me motivated to do my job. It is important that one finds inner peace and happiness. It is equally important for people to understand the social variables that determine a functional cordial relationship opposed to a relationship that offers nothing but boredom, misery, insecurity and an assortment of emotional constant distress. Psychology teaches us that there is how you think things should be and then there is the reality of how things will undoubtedly be if you do not adopt a program to cultivate an endless yield of mutual goals, desires and aspirations that nurture a loving and conducive relationship between two people. As long as I can help one person at a time, that’s fulfilling enough for me. Have yourself a superb 2018.


 

In 2018, more couples need to embrace sexual knowledge and discovery.

More women need sexual liberation, they should learn how to orgasm to the point of squirting.

We must all say NO to FGM aka STOP the cut.

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#teammasimba


 

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Dear Matheka,

I wish you a happy new year. It has been a long journey since I met you in August 2016. I want to begin by thanking you for your patience with me. We chatted for months before I ever got the courage to meet you and you never gave up on me. Even though my marriage ended, I must admit that I am in a much better space. When I met you mysadblackwoman confidence and self esteem was at its lowest point but through our sessions I gain self awareness and inner love for myself that had be beaten out of me for 9 years. Marriage is overrated and until I met you I actually thought it was my fault that my husband repeated emotionally crucified me. If I knew then at 22 what I know today I would have taken my time before getting into marriage of which I thought was the epitome to becoming a woman. I believed in my husband, he was my King almost a God in my World. How could a man who loved me hurt me was my thinking. I always heard women complain about men but I told myself that my baby was different, he was the exception to the rule. Little did I know he fed me a false narrative, constantly seduced me with his charming ways as he cultivated relationships with other women who facilitated in his sexual escapades. Then I met Matheka. The man who tells you as it is and truth be told I kind of hated you for telling me the truth about my marriage. One trait I hope you maintain is your ability to listen, that was refreshing. You let me vent without judgement and for that I appreciate your patience.

In March 2017 I could not believe my husband’s actions when he brought his girlfriend into our home and gave me an ultimatum to stay or leave. He also was truthful enough to admit that he walk away from our last session because of your deduction that he may not have loved me as he had claimed. It was pretty hurtful to learn that my marriage was a convenience for him, that I was only a trophy wife. Matheka I cried for days after he told me but I overcame the hurt.

Fast forward, you periodically checked on me and I remember reading one of your posts about a woman who had rediscovered herself and it sparked my interest. We continued our chats and in September 2017 I told you that I was ready to turn a new leaf in my life and so we had our sessions. All I can say is wow wow wow, you have completely transformed me as a woman. For once in my life I can say I know myself. My mentalityHappyblackwoman III towards sex has totally changed for the better all thanks to you. When you kept saying you teach a woman to own 70% of her ability to orgasm, I had no idea what you meant but now I know and I am a beneficiary of your teachings. Excuse my TMI moment but after months of practicing the vagina muscle movements you taught me, I had sex with that stud I told you about and he was so thrilled when I squirted. The man can’t stop texting and calling me, he always finds an angle to bring up squirting. It’s laughable, the things that excite you men but I am not complaining. After your counsel I am getting to learn the true nature of men rather than the mythical man most of us women want men to be. Matheka, because of you and I never thought I would say this but I am able to have casual sex and enjoy sex like never before, whom am I kidding, in my marriage orgasms were miracles almost unheard of but today I can make it rain lol. As you can see I am on a roller-coaster which was influenced by you. You took me from a very dark place to a place full of peace, hope and happiness. Thank you for all that you did for me and I hope my story will encourage other women to spread their wings and rediscover themselves. Be blessed Matheka.

Maurice replies,

For once I am speechless. Such feedback is why I keep doing what I do to help individuals like yourself. We all love a great story especially if it has a happy ending. But not all relationships will witness bliss or end as per the vows couples exchange. Life is unpredictable, in our society today there are far more social variables that can collapse or discourage a functional relationship than those who impact on a relationship positively. Despite all the cultures, traditions and religious elements that are meant to enforce social discipline, people will still misbehave and break the unwritten rules of society. However, if we were more open to discussing and debating human behaviour based on proven scientific research we might solve some of our social problems that plague our society. It all begins with catching up with data that updates you with the ever evolving human being. Happy New Year to you, be well and be safe.

———————————————————————

In 2018, more couples need to embrace sexual knowledge and discovery.

More women need sexual liberation, they should learn how to orgasm to the pint of squirting.

We must all say NO to FGM aka STOP the cut.

#ProudlyKilungu

#teammasimba


To my esteemed readers,

Please like and follow my facebook page https://web.facebook.com/mauricetherapy/

I will be regularly posting my videos.

In 2018, more couples need to embrace sexual knowledge and discovery.

More women need sexual liberation, they should learn how to orgasm to the pint of squirting.

We must all say NO to FGM aka STOP the cut.


 

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Is he bewitched????

Dear Maurice,

I have been married for 11 years. I am 35 with 3 children. I am born again and I thought my husband was as religiously dedicated as I am. About 2 weeks ago I went through his phone and found numerous chats with other women, 6 women to be precise but one chat caught my attention because their exchanges were very candid and open, which does not describe the man I know as my husband. Please note I have not confronted him and that is why I am reaching out to you. I need to know on how best to tackle this issue with him. This woman , who happens to be someone’s wife asked my husband why he desired her so much and he responded by telling her that he loved her sex. He addedblowjobbliss that her pussy was sweet (words my husband would never use), apparently her pussy makes him really hard, is he bewitched? He told her he loved how she gave him a blow job and how he got turned on when she swallowed his cum. He also said “my wife would never allow such”. In the 14 years I have known this man he has never asked or shown interested in such acts. Our sex has never gone for longer than a few minutes and because he is the only man I have known sexually I thought we were both happy. Matheka, this man has shocked me, he is very prayerful and extremely strict in his home. I really don’t know what has happened to the man I knew, how can my husband text another woman how he longs to eat her pussy all night long when he has only given me minutes! Is it possible for a man to have double personality?

Maurice replies,

Would I be right to state that you were attracted to your husband because you believed he was God fearing and morally correct? If I may ask, is your husband Kenyan and how old is your husband and was he a virgin when you met?

She replies,

Yes, those were the values I stood for and still stand for hence my shock. My husband is 9 years my senior, another reason for marrying him because I thought he was mature and past this things he is portraying now. He is Kenyan and he was not a virgin when we met.

Maurice replies,

I do not want to speculate on how long this may have been going on but this is a classic case on a man who has to abide by societal norms/expectations so when you met he sold you the face that made him look like a potential husband. When you took the bait he then at some point of your courtship deemed you a potential wife and from then on he consciously made a decision that for the rest of his life he would showcase a conservative personality which adheres to the traditional setting of a family. It explains why he has been strict, to make sure he aligns you to a way of behaving as his wife that conforms to acceptable mannerism of a wife, excuse my French but I call it absolute bullshit but that’s our society sadly. Now the man you stumbled upon chatting with those women and being more open than you ever thought possible is his true character. Your husband has a sense of fetish that has always been him but he was never going to show you that side of him (the real side) because our so called conservative society does not expect married people to indulge in such sexual acts. The double standards that favour men in Kenya are unbelievable but a reality.

She replies,

Are you saying that he most probably married me because I was marriage material and a viable source to give him children?

Maurice replies,

Based on his evident double life, the answer is yes. Men rarely marry for love exclusively, there is always an end goal, especially with the pressures to marry and gain a family. It is equally as rare to find a man who marries his lust factor, meaning the woman he consistently finds sexually attractive. In short, men rarely marry their ultimate sexual mate. There are plenty of proven scientific reasons for men cheating but the most basic one is because men love thrills, our sexual ego is driven by what people call ‘cheap thrills’, the combination of conquering mixed with our procreational design is a cocktail of sexual intent. Your husband is product of a toxic society which urgently needs to review its understanding of social trends, social dynamics and human sexual behaviour. If your husband conformed to your religious guidelines you would not be in this predicament.

She replies,

But I thought men who get married are over such behaviour.

Maurice replies,

You cannot be further from the truth. There is a small pool of men in society who harbour puppy love and they truly marry for love but the vast majority have other reasons of convenience behind their decision to marry.

She replies,

Matheka you have confused me further, I was expecting you to tell me he is bewitched or it is just a phase but instead you are painting a man who has been living a double life. How do I deal with this scenario, I know I can never agree to his sexual desires? As it is I am disappointed and mad at him but I must find calm within me as expected by my faith.

Maurice replies,

Having dealt with such cases, your husband will either deny deny deny and even profess to have been possessed by demons or he will finally unveil his true self and give you ultimatums on how you will live in harmony from here henceforth. If you want to confront him, I recommend you calmly use reverse psychology. He expects you to be livid after this revelations. You need to approach him with a logical mind not an emotional one. Tell him that you have knowledge of his kinky indiscretions and that you are not mad at him but you would like to know why he has hidden that side of him, tell him you did not know he loved cumming in a woman’s mouth which will confirm to him you have seen the evidence, you then walk away to allow him to ponder over what he has just heard from his conservative wife. Your mission is to avoid him coming up with excuses and for him to tell you the truth. Once you have the truth, you can then figure out what your future will look like.

Again based on my experience with such cases, please do not find yourselves going to your local pastor or priest for prayers, he will only make promises that sound genuine only for him to remodel his avenues of seeking out his sexual thrills. The minute you confront him it will never be business as usual in your home so make your decision knowing that the tides will be rough for a while. You can always call me for me to guide you in the reverse psychology.


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Mr Matheka. I hope this finds you well. I have a pressing matter and I was referred to you by a counsel that I had initially consulted. He was not able to satisfy my quest, he implied you were more open to tackling sexual matters.

Maurice asks,

What is your issue?

He replies,confusedblackmale

Firstly, I am 36 years old. I am an accomplished Engineer and a giver at heart. My issue is about a lady who is currently in my life. She is 25 and jobless. I cater for all her needs. I bought her an apartment and a car. I maintain her day to day life and I do my best to love her but after all this pampering she dares to insult me with her sexual needs.

Maurice asks,

Would you say you are conservative?

He replies,

Matheka, don’t get me wrong. I am exposed, in my studies I have traveled the World but I do not see why I should indulge in unnatural acts. For example, she wants me to suck orblowjobebony lick her private parts, am not sure which is which. She tries to touch and suck my member during sex and it feels very uncomfortable when she sucks me. There is a time I felt like doing my business in her mouth and she was not fearing me cumming, what is wrong with this woman. I told her about my past sex life where I would climb the woman and after I was done that was it. She told me there was more to sex between a man and woman. She tells me to hold it in and I can’t. it is alleged men go for long like 10 to 15 minutes, is this even practical? I do not know why she insists on this kind of engagement.

Maurice replies,

What you may call unnatural acts are natural sexual acts for many people in our ever evolving World. You may be well traveled but I have a feeling your travels were about your studies and field of expertise so I highly doubt you dabbled in sexual exploration hence your demeanor. There is actually nothing wrong with your sexually preference, each to their own, but your problem is stemming from the fact that you are dating a woman who is more versed in the sexual realm. In my professional opinion, a conservative should never date a liberal because at some point your persona differences will creep up and begin to tare into your relationship.

He replies,

I have told her to quit behaving like she does. Considering I am running her existence can she not sacrifice her ungodly exposure and settle with me without stressing my life.

Maurice asks,

I am curious, for how long have you dated her?

He replies,

I have known her for almost 2 years. By the way, I consider her my second wife. I am married with children. I want to tame her. She needs to conform to my traditional lifestyle.

Maurice replies,

If I may ask, did you not begin your relationship with her for her to be your fun factor considering you have a wife?

He replies,

Yes, I got bored with my wife and found a lot fun with her. What is your point?

Maurice replies,

Well, you may not understand male sexual psychology but the fact is if you attempt to change her, when she is meant to be your girlfriend not wife, you will only be molding another wife and at some point you will again find boredom in another woman and the circle will repeat itself. You will replace her, I guarantee you. For whatever reason you found your wife boring and proceeded to seek thrills elsewhere, men do this all the time. But I urge you not to transform your girlfriend into a wife, your mindset, your perception about your union will kill your relationship.

That said, in context, your relationship will be difficult. Unless she is willing to transform into your ideal conservative traditional woman, of which I do not advocate for, I foresee a string of future issues and many will be driven by her resentment towards you. Humans have been known to change their entire character to please others but that creates room for long term resentment. Only you and her can come to a mutual agreement but in an ideal World you would seek out for an equally conservative woman and officiate your second wife union with consent from your wife. Again, I remind you, despite your distaste for cunnilingus and fellatio you engaged another woman for her ability to give you thrills that lack in your home. If you continue with your current trajectory your lust factor for her will disintegrate.

He replies,

I am confident that she will conform otherwise I will take back everything I her availed for her.

Maurice replies,

That my friend is your prerogative. However, in my book it defines you as a man who is willing to use his financial prowess to in-slave a woman. She is most likely grateful that you are taking care of her but do not ignore the fact that there is a part of her that in time will rebel especially if she feels entrapped beyond her threshold to persevere with what she may rightfully perceive as harsh conditions. My job is to highlight the possible social variables that may destabilize your relationship. Take my consult into consideration and re-evaluate you true need for another woman in your life.

He replies,

Matheka, as much as I did not want you to over analyse me, I respect your trade and I will consider your advice. I am curious as to why you did not ask or bring up my wife?

Maurice replies,

Only amateurs would bring up your wife. Your consult was about your relationship with girlfriend. I deal with each case as presented. To give you constructive consult I must address your issue with facts relating to your dynamic and not through emotional disposition or social psychological engineering. People like yourself come to me because my job is not to judge you but to understand your dilemma and give you information, based on a professional perceptive, that will aid in your quest, what you do with that information is entirely up to you.

He replies.

Asante Matheka. If you don’t mind I shall revert back for more consult once I figure out what I want. Be blessed.

Maurice replies,

You are very welcome.


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Dear Maurice,

I am in a real twist and I need your help to figure out things in my life. I have been dating someone going onto 3 years now and it has been exciting but in the last 4 monthsHappy Newlyweds in Front of Mansion I have been trying to slow things down in relation to our overly active kinky lifestyle. I have been hinting that I want to settle down with her but she has resisted claiming that we are fine as we are. She even put me in a situation where I had to make her choose between me and her girlfriend.

Maurice asks,

Interesting, what do you mean by her choosing between you and her girlfriend?

He replies,

One of the things I liked about her when we met is that she is bi-sexual and I love that in a woman. A few months ago we met this girl who she has been sexually involved withebonythreesome II within the confines of my home but I never felt threatened until she walked out when I asked her to choose between us.

Maurice asks,

What is made you feel like settling down?

He replies,

It hit me that I have attended so many of my friends weddings, to be precise four close pals have married. I feel like its my turn. There is also pressure from family to bring them a girl.

Maurice replies,

Many people get to that point in their life where they feel like they need to fulfill some right of passage but you must ask yourself if you truly understand what marriage is. The reason I say this is because I meet plenty of married folk who are regretful, depressed, miserable and bored. Many of them looking for avenues to leave or psychologically detach themselves from their marriage, and when I say many I mean about 90% of people in marriage. I am not trying to discourage you but I need to highlight the facts that I deal with. But most of all I want to deal with your relationship dynamic. From the little you have shared I can tell that you are in a functional relationship based on mutual likes between you and your woman. However I fear, if you do get married your change of mindset within marriage will damage your bond. For example, if you do marry her, will carry on as usual or will you ask her to change?

He replies,

To some degree I will want her to change. I need her to be the mother of our future children. So her dressing and mannerisms will have to change, I mean that is standard rite?

Maurice replies,

That is the problem right there. These so called ‘serious’ relationship are detrimental to others. You want to marry her and you also expect her to conform in accordance to ‘unwritten’ societal rules of how a married woman should conduct herself. That in my opinion is absolute bollocks. I can imagine you will want her to kill her sexual persona or will you allow her to be herself?

He replies,

I know I can’t have a wife who goes around kisses other women so she will have to give up that lifestyle at some point.

Maurice replies,

I can see why she is resisting your advances to settle down. Let me break down, you currently have a woman who facilitates in relation to your sexual preferences. You enjoyebonythreesome III watching her make out with other women and I am sure you indulge in threesomes and more, am I on the right track?

He replies,

Yes, this is our current lifestyle.

Maurice replies,

And you are trying to convince me that you will sacrifice your fetishes and have a content life with one woman, is that what you are saying?

He replies,

Don’t judge me but I will still have that life but with other women. We both know that in the African setting your wife can’t behave like a whore, plus the respect I will grant her will not allow me to look at her in the same way. I need her to be my home maker.

Maurice replies,

With all due respect, that is rubbish. This is why women end up with a raw deal. I am glad that you are being honest but it also proves that you are already preparing your mindset and perceptions towards her to change. Once she becomes your wife you will over time cease to view her as your sexual mate, she will stop being your ‘fun factor’ and that is why you are honest enough to state that you will explore your sexual preferences with other women. Is she aware that you think of her as a whore?

He replies,

I don’t mean it literally. I just need her to act like a wife. But at the moment we are not even talking. Could she be in love with that girl?

Maurice replies,

I don’t think it is appropriate to call your woman a whore and yet if she changes to this morally up right wife you won’t even want to have sex with her. You are embarking on a journey to corrupt your mind towards your woman and that will gradually create a rift between you. My friend, if indeed she is in love with the girl then you might be in more trouble than you think. There is a much higher chance of getting your woman back if she is having an affair with another man, but when it is another woman you will need a miracle to get her back. Take it from me, I have seen grown men crying after realizing that they have lost their woman to another woman. To add to injury, your display of insecurity when you asked her to choose did not help your course. It made you look weak. Give her time to decide what she really wants. I recommend that you rethink your settling down dynamic, let it be inclusive. We both know if you kill her personality you will only seek sexual pleasures and adventures from other women. But if you desperately need to get married to someone who you can control, why not find a conservative submissive character, just saying. I do not subscribe to terminating a woman’s persona and sexual liberation for selfish reasons. If you will it, you can have best of both Worlds with one woman. There is no logical reason for you to mold a woman into someone you will cease to have a desire for. It makes no sense.

He replies,

I hear you bro. Thank you for your comments. I will take a break for a few months and hopefully rethink like you said.


Never ever sacrifice your character for anyone, your decision will come back and haunt you later in life. They say opposites attract, that is bull crap, not useless you are trying to light a bulb!


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Dear Maurice,

I need to pour my heart out to someone and you are one of the few people I know might understand my existing dilemma. I have been married for 9 years and to my shock I thought my marriage was fairly good but my husband’s revelations have confirmed to the contrary. We met in campus, dated for 2 years then drifted apart and rekindled 3 years later.

Maurice replies,

What is your dilemma?

She replies,Frustrated Woman Using Laptop

My husband has been having an affair with a good friend of mine and with some other side chick. He forgot to log off our shared laptop and I found conversations between him and the two women. I read enough to conclude that they have been seeing each other for over 2 years.

Maurice asks,

Does he know that you know?

She replies,

Yes he does. I confronted him and he did not deny his involvement with both women. He proceeded to tell me that he is glad that he has been caught, he said he was tired of living a double life. I did my best to hide it but I was terrified because it sounded as if he was about to announce that he was leaving me. I could tell in his voice that he was not afraidSadblackcouple of me finding out and that made me feel vulnerable. I asked him why would he cheat, and his reply was “you lied to me years ago, we made a pact that if ever we were to get married we would not be sexually conservative like most married people” he added “you have declined all our opportunities to explore our kinky side and have concentrated squarely on your career and family life forgetting that your man needed your undivided attention, so when you failed to deliver I opted for other fruitful avenues”. I asked him, did you have to fuck my friend. He replied, you were the one who fed her information about your short comings and she availed herself , I could not resist her offer. She knew exactly what I wanted and she offered with extra bonuses, deal with it, this is a situation of your own making.

Maurice asks,

Is any of what he is saying true? I can only give you conclusive answers about your dilemma with facts, I cannot answer you based on emotions or morals. Did you make that pact with him and have you neglected him as he implies?

She replies,

Yes, we made that pact. But that was years ago. I did not foresee him remembers words we shared while in campus. He has been consistent in his sexual nature but I thought he would tone down once we caught married. I usually have a 50 hour week and I do stay away from home a lot because of work related schedules but I thought he was content with the sex we occasionally have when I am home and during the two week vacation that we take annually, I thought that would sustain him. I admit I have declined all of his sexual adventures but its because I did not deem it appropriate for us to indulge in our once mutual fantasies within our confines of marriage. Was he justified to take those adulterous actions?

Maurice replies,

In all honesty even I would cheat living under those conditions. Your problems begun when you started having your own perception of what marriage should be and you clearly did not loop or consider your husband’s idea of marriage. Do you know how boring ‘confines of marriage’ sounds. I thank you for accepting your part in these revelations. My job is not to question whether your husband was justified or not, that would be counterproductive, my role is attempt to reconnect you that’s if you are interested?

She replies,

He actually gave him two options, to stay and remodel myself to the woman he thought he was married to or to leave him. He said he is not willing to sacrifice his wants and needs in life to survive in marriage. I can’t afford to lose him.

Maurice replies,

Your husband has basically given you a chance to reignite your lust factor and reconnect not just as a married couple but as ‘boyfriend & girlfriend’ and that is one of the stronger ingredients that matter to keep the juices of lust flowing. In my opinion, a marriage with no lust is a dead marriage of convenience. You need to trace back where you left that open minded girl within you and let her back into your relationship, that’s the girl in marriage not the individual you have become. The problem we face in this continent called Africa, is that we don’t envision marriage as a fun place but have for a long time branded marriage as ‘hard’,’difficult’, using words like ‘compromise & sacrifice’ to justify and cushion the imprisoning features within marriage. If you want to out survive other marriages then you cannot conform to societal norms and unwritten strict rules of marriage.

She replies,

You are right. I need to reintroduce him to the girl he once dated. Maurice, I guess sometimes we readjust and fall into a comfort zone which feels safe but as I have witnessed has its downfalls. I will willingly conform to things that my husband likes and it should be easy because I once wanted the same. I am happy we have chatted but what about my friend, she has no idea I know about her sexual affair with my husband?

Maurice asks,

The question is simple, do you hate her or are you open enough to see past that and engage her on a more positive note? Does your husband’s assortment of desires involve third parties like a threesome or a tribbing voyeur fetish. The reason I ask is because ifebonythreesome your husband has already nurtured a connection with her then it is only logical in the realm of sexual preference to involve her. There is a high probability that he will not connect with any other women you may want to involve at this junction, perhaps later. Blatantly omitting her will also make you look sexually insecure and that won’t trigger well in your sexual escapades with your husband. Remember you need to showcase the kinkier you not the vulnerable wife! Plus we don’t even know whether she would like to be party to any of this. Anyway, that’s my professional advice, mine is to share crucial key indicators, what you do from there on is your choice.

She replies,

Wow Maurice, I really appreciate and admire your honesty. It’s now down to me to initiate and show my husband that I still have that naughty girl within me. I just need to find her and have words hehehe. We need to get our man back. Thank you. I will let you know how things go.

Maurice replies,

You are very welcome. If I can help people advance their bond and sexuality I am always game. Please make sure you market me to your friends.

She replies,

I sure will, many need your services. Depending on how things go, would you recommend package 6 for me and hubby, learning to squirt has been on my bucket list I might as well incorporate it into my new sexual journey?

Maurice replies,

First let’s reintroduce your husband to the girl he needs you to be thereafter anything is possible and once you reacquire your sexual bond then we can schedule that session. I have a feeling your husband would be very open to it.

She replies,

Oh, did I not mention he knows you. The other woman he was chatting with shared this article  https://mauricetherapy.com/2016/08/30/threesome-fantasy/  with him and he was extremely open to the content. So I know he will be open to our session with you.

Maurice replies,

That is super. Keep me posted on developments. I wish you the best my dear.


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