mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

My husband and I would like to give you our sincere gratitude for your candid directive over the period we met you. When we look back we realised that we almost jumped ship because we were not willing to accept the issues we had in our marriage. Even though we thought you were overly blunt we totally appreciated your no nonsense approach. One question that comes to mind was when you asked us at our first session if we were holding hands to mask problems or were we so in-love which would render the purpose of the session non productive. You also asked us if we both wanted the same out of the session, you emphasized on whether we were both targeting the finish line. Well, I can confirm that we made it to the finish line.

To my readers,

The above is based on feedback that I had requested from the couple. Like many couple when they came to me they were almost at the end of the road. The reason why I share this story is because this couple had unique variables. They had dated for 3 years and when I met them they were only 6 weeks into their marriage. They do not have a child so it would have been easy for them to just walk away from each other but instead they chose to face their issues head on.

It was the wife who made the initial contact. She claimed that her young marriage was a false marriage because what they really felt was swept under the carpet and had been from the onset. She did mention during our phone conversation that when she said “I do” she felt a wave of mixed emotions because at that moment she knew she had embarked into a wormhole with unsolved issues.

Fortunately, her husband agreed to a session where all was laid on the table. Let me put it into context, her husband was a great financial provider but in the department of affection and sex he was closed for renovations which seemed to take as long as the construction of the Nairobi by pass.

During the session it was abundantly clear that over 90% of their daily arguments about trivial matters were given birth by the fact that their intimacy was almost non existent. Here is a list of her sentiments:

1) You hardly compliment me, I need to feel attractive

2) Apart from the morning kiss, why do I always initiate physical affection

3) In public, you never hold my hand or kiss me, are you ashamed of me

4) You only check up on me at work when you need something

5) In the bedroom, I have tried and tried to direct you to the bodily areas that turn me on but instead you indirectly brush me off by pretending to listen then you go on and do things that put me off sex

6) I need you to sometimes make me breakfast or we make breakfast together and make out in the kitchen

Satisfactory sex especially in relation to female pleasure is 15% to 30% of what makes a relationship work however if your sex life is unsatisfactory then it becomes 80% to 90% of your relationship. Sex then becomes a commodity.

When the husband opened up he did admit that he knew of his short coming but was too embarrassed to talk about them. In his opinion a married woman was not touched in public. I don’t blame him. I blame our useless primitive societal school of thought that needs to update itself with today’s social dynamics of matrimony and relationships in general.

He also highlighted the things that were outlined during their premarital counseling. From his understanding, his core duties were to be the man of the house and provide for his wife and future family. In the context of that ancient ideology he is not at fault, if anything he should be handed a medal of honour. But in the context of modern age where women are not door mats and know their sexual rights he neglected his primal duties as a man.

The program I gave them set them on a journey where they would rediscover their social arena; going for movies, sharing a conversational lunch or dinner and flirting as they share sexual desires. I made it very clear that the above means nothing if they do not share a mutual target to succeed. As the saying goes ‘it takes two to tango’.

On the topic of sex when I had a session with the husband alone he like many men before him had no clue what was physically done for a woman to feel like her man was making love to her.

My reply was shift and to the point. What women regard as making love is the act of sex where they feel loved, feel an immense connection with their partner, and experience a flow of endless passion during the sexual motions. This is where the wiring of a man and woman collide. We actual mean the same thing but how it is describes psychologically registers differently between men and women.

Many women respond to the notion of ‘making love’, on the other hand the word ‘fucking’ registers with most men as a positive act which arouses them. Many women (thankfully not all) think the word ‘fucking’ is disrespectful and describes non loving sex (whatever that means). The fact is, making love or fucking is exactly the same sexual act, the difference only applies when it comes down to who is driving your vagina. If the driver is selfish it will not matter what you tag your sex session, chances are he will disappoint regardless. Once I explained the above to him things were clearer.

It was encouraging that during their therapy program they ventured into the unknown. She had never given him oral sex (because he had declined) and he had never ever thought of going down to the Valley of erotic juices.He is now a certified cupcake licker. He is proudly kissing his woman in public, spanking her in public is currently work in progress. He has also revised his attitude towards complimenting his woman’s look. He did confess to finding his wife attractive but the thought of complimenting her was going against everything he thought was manly. Thankfully that is no longer the case. I am glad that they chose the path of developing their relationship and I strongly believe their new sense of liberation will enhance their long term bond.

There is no prescribe formula that will revive, save or enhance your relationship but the key ingredient is a mutual acceptance of a problem and the willingness to do whatever it takes to fuel the flames of attraction.

———-

I am encouraging more men to attend my sessions with their partners, it is a platform to voice your views without judgement. I would like to organise for such a forum in May. All I need is 10 couples to show interest at a fee of 4K per couple, once I have the numbers we will set a date, time and venue. The preferred day will be on a Saturday. If interested you can text me or whatsapp me on 0720229351.

Read Full Post »

Dear Maurice,

I have reason to believe my husband is sleeping around with my neighbour’s maid. I know our sex life is and has been dead for a long while but why can’t he play his games with decent women.

Maurice asks,

Are you implying that you have accepted his cheating ways and hoped he would cheat with a certain caliber of woman?

She replies,

Not exactly, no woman wants to know her husband is being unfaithful but at the same time I am aware of something I created long ago.

Maurice asks,

And what is that that you created?

She replies,

We have been married for 8 years, about 4 years ago after our second child I pushed my husband away. Whenever he would make advances I would find an excuse to kill the moment. I did so for a while and for some years he was persistent until one day he stopped initiating. That was 2 years ago. Our sex life went from having sex 6 times a week to once a month or at times we go for months without intimacy.

Maurice replies,

So what you are admitting to is that you believe you pushed your husband away and that is why he is cheating as you allege?

She replies,

Yes I admit I pushed him away even though it does not justify his actions but what I really want to understand from you is why her, she is just a maid, a nobody, she is cheap in every sense of the word.

Maurice replies,

She may be a maid but she is still a woman who I assume has the bodily attributes that stimulate a man visually. What makes you think your husband is cheating?

She replies,

My neighbour’s family joined our family for a Christmas getaway and during that trip my husband conversed with her whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Maurice replies,

I am confused. Your husband was comfortable enough to engage your neighbour’s maid in conversation while the two families were together. Didn’t that look odd to any of you?

She replies,

Ok, maybe I should clarify on something, the maid is actually related to my friend’s husband. She begun working for them after her ambitions for college fell through. She was given a choice to stay and help out with their kids and home or go live with her parents in their rural home.

Maurice replies,

That changes the context, she is family to your neighbour hence why your husband found it appropriate to engage her in conversation.

She replies,

I guess so. I found incriminating texts between her and my husband that suggest steamy moments together but I have not raised the alarm.

Maurice asks,

What do you want to do with the evidence you have and how would you like me to help in this matter?

She replies,

I have read your articles enough to know that confronting him may cause him to go on the defensive and close up. I also know that once a man puts up his defensive wall bringing that wall down can be almost impossible. I am not going anywhere, I am definitely not leaving him, if anything I need to know what I can do to get his attention back. I shared with a friend and she was asking what I am still doing in the relationship after finding out. I am not excusing my husband but I did push him away and the reason I want to stay in this marriage is because he persistent for a very long while before giving up. If I could give him back the woman he married I might have a chance of saving our marriage, most importantly our sexual connection which used to be so strong.

Maurice asks,

Are you and your husband still friends, can you sit down and have a candid talk? Secondly does he know that you blame yourself for your current predicament? I believe that if indeed you want to revive your connection, you must sincerely admit to your husband that you know you pushed him away and that for a long while you know he tried to get your attention but to no avail. If he still has a spark of sexual attraction towards you then you might be able to reignite the flame you once had.

You need to be ready to work for his attention, he may not respond immediately because he may ask himself why now, why the sudden change of sexual climate, will it be short lived, these are all questions that he may likely ask himself. You need to use your feminine side to assure him that the woman he wants was sexually attracted to is back and here to stay. This is not a matter of love, it is a mission to revive the look of lust and sexual craving he once had for you.

She replies,

Thank you so much Maurice. I now have a better idea of what I need to do. And thank you for listening, I will contact you if I need any further advice.

Read Full Post »

I have noticed a trend and it needs to end today, it needs to end now. Women keep telling me that my fellow Kenyan brothers are unwilling to learn how to pleasure them to the point they fantasies over some imaginary man who can ‘take them there’. I want to believe that many of these women are wrong but too often do I hear the same story across the Country.

I have a passion of liberating people sexually and especially when I receive positive feedback from couples it makes my work worthwhile. However, there seems to be a category of married men who have refused to explore their limits, which translates to they are not willing to gain skills that will pleasure their wife. Correct me if I am wrong but I have always known men to want to please their woman sexually or have times changed. I am no special case, I am a Kenyan man like any other but at one point in my life I was man enough to say “I do not know everything about women and sex but I am willing to learn”. Now here I am with a finger more effective than most penises and I have no apologies to make. I also have the ability to read a woman’s body. How did I acquire this skill. It is simple, I was willing to learn. I did not have the attitude that just because I was born a man and I have a penis I naturally know it all. That is shallow thinking and I would like to think that there are men out there who want to join the club of giving a woman an orgasm. It is a woman’s right to have an orgasm. And it is our duty as men to make sure she orgasms whether through your penis, fingers or tongue.

Trust me, the club has its rewards. Wanting to acquire new knowledge about sex does not mean you are currently inadequate it just means that in your hood your male neighbours will start to view you as the alpha because they frequently hear your wife calling out your name in a orgasmic context. Wouldn’t you want to be the envy of your social circles, when people are complaining about what is lacking in their bedroom you just sit there with a grin on your face.

Gents, we were not born with female bodily attributes so lets not pretend we are experts because frankly I am getting tired of women complaining about men who can’t kiss, on a serious note how lazy can your lips be, how can they lack coordination, and men who handle nipples as if they are searching for a radio frequency. I am also tired of hearing how some men go down on a woman and instead of experiencing pleasure she feels like she is under going surgery. This has to stop. Ask her how she likes it and she will tell you and direct you to a path of pleasure.

I am not saying that women do not have their faults, they do especially those women who firmly hold your penis during a blow job and handle the penis as if it were a vehicle stick shift, not a pleasant experience at all. But gents the spot light is unfortunately on you because during sex a man will ejaculate but it is not a guarantee that a woman will orgasm. We as men should be open to learning new things, you have nothing to lose (unless she leaves you) and everything to gain. That should be your mentality. Let me remind you, a sexually satisfied woman is a very grateful productive woman.

Together lets prove women wrong, lets show them that Kenyan men are open minded and are willing to move mountains to ensure that sex is equally as exciting for her as it is for you. Gents the ball is in your court, I recall saying that this year 2014 I want to have men in my sessions so if you know you have a click of boys who would like to learn how to stimulate a vagina till a woman squirts, all you have to do is call me and we can start a revolution. If it was up to me there would be a National orgasm day where all women would orgasm in harmony. What an ideal sexually liberated society that would be ‘wet beds everywhere’.

Wherever you are make sure to remind your partner how sexy they are, let them know that they rock your World. Getting used to each other is not an option. It is a key ingredient to relationship survival for both parties to boost each other positively. You initial union was based on attraction and that should never be allowed to die. Gents, I am giving you a challenge and I want you to take it on and let our Nation be known for men who pleasure their woman at a moments notice.

Read Full Post »

Human behaviour has always been an interest of mine. Even with societal unwritten rules of how we should live together humans are ever breaking away from set rules. I guess in my experienced opinion the reason is simple, we may be an intelligent being but like animals when we feel caged in whatever context we attempt to break out.

After speaking to a forum of men socially it was crystal clear that   the notion of the picket fence family has slowly mutated into different forms of unions. In an ideal setting the picket fence family is the model we should all desire.

One man’s narration stood out but it is more common than people think. His perspective on marriage was not what women would like to hear but it was based on a logic that has been adopted by many men, especially those men who acquired their wealth without a woman’s influence.

He was proud to be a family man but his pride was given birth by the sense of achievement. What do I mean? Well, his mother once told him that he was not getting any younger and that she wanted grand children. After several reminders he one day set out to find himself a wife, a woman who would give him ‘good looking’ children and the key criteria was looks over brains. She had to visually excite him even though that excitement might be short lived. What do I mean by ‘short lived’? He had 3 goals when he was searching for a wife. He needed to find a suitable attractive candidate. He needed to fulfill his mother’s wishes and lastly he needed to acquire a new status in society. That status would gain him credentials that would aid in a potential promotion at work or aid in business networking, how you may ask? In the society we live in it is thought that men who are married are more responsible and that sense of responsibility reflects in their work as they ‘work harder’ to climb the ladder of success to provide for their family. In my opinion that ideology is flawed.

So where were we, when he achieves his goals his social efforts take a sudden dip and his wife takes notice and confronts him. If she is unfortunate to have married a blunt man she is then hit by a response she never thought she would receive from her ‘loving husband’. Without any hesitation he tells her that he has adequately provided for her and that she has no right to question him.

Whenever I have interviewed this kind of man, the thought process is always the same. He will say “Maurice, I have given her everything, our kids go to elite schools, she has multiple cars to pick from, she has a generous allowance to shop every month, she lives in luxury, she has a mansion with a pool and she gets to travel around the World at least 3 to 4 times a year”. I then ask him, do you love her? He then makes it very clear that he had an agenda. His reply was “I married her because she was suitable and available at the time but my marrying her did not come with a promise to love her in the context of emotional attachment”.

The days when couples would tell a story of their humble days that gradually over years saw them join high society are rare. Economics of the World today have made humans money hungry and that craving for the ‘high life’ has its consequences.

Because men have the label of being ‘providers’ the above will directly affect women because they pick their alleged eternal soul mate by a criteria that is driven by comforts. There is nothing wrong with comforts, everyone wants to prosper and graduate to a better lifestyle but at what cost is usually the question most ignore. Despite wanting wealth, many women who have acquired it one day wake up to the reality that their life is surrounded by material things but love was never and will never be part of the package.

Make the right choice. Marry for the right reasons and most importantly do not rush for a gold mine that you had no input in. Marrying into a bank volt may grant you all your material desires but it will not grant you a partner who unconditionally loves you. Again the choice is yours, and learn to live with the one you decide to make.

Read Full Post »

We are all searching for love, for that ultimate companion…. or are we!!!! After speaking to a number of women over the festive season it was quite a revelation to hear their sentiments about relationships. These women mostly ranged from 30 to 40 years old. As you can imagine there wasn’t much good news about their counterparts. Most of these women have attempted at one stage in their life to mold a man into the kind of man they can be proud of but it has all been in vain. They said that men today struggle to be men. Even those men who are supposed to be ‘mature’ are holding onto their youth by maintaining a playful social life which is not conducive to family life.

The women felt that they had two sets of kids in their home, their actual kids and their husband who according to them is the biggest kid and attention seeker, requiring too much ego soothing and to them that is too much work.

Some were candid enough to say they are fed up with the fighting and false promises and have decided to balance their World to regain their freedom and sanity. To the point that some of these women have four men in their life.

Man number one is their hubby, the home facilitator (provider). He is the man of the house but he is rarely home. The kids call him ‘daddy’ but in her eyes all he ever did was father them. She wishes he could play a more active role in his home as a father and as her man. He forgets that apart from being a mother she has other needs as a woman.

Man number two is the man who explores the lips between her thighs and rocks her World ‘literally’. This is the man who understands her body contours. This is the man who knows that a bed has 4 corners, he takes her for a tour. He makes sure her natural body lotion is smeared across the bed. In short, he makes her womanhood throb.

Number three, well, this guy is what I like to call the ‘will you drop me and my girls’ guy. His car always has fuel, he is available at a moments notice. This guy is usually ‘mr nice guy’ aka delusional or in denial. This guy never stood a chance in the ‘I could do you’ list. He was quickly processed into the friend zone then he graduated into the ‘you are like a brother’ category. In some occasions he is philanthropic enough to assist financially, especially when number one fails to deliver. The saddest thing about this guy is that he will never get to taste her cookie.

Then there is number four. He is the constant in her life. He is her true friend and her confidant. He gets to hear all about the rest, the good and the bad. He advises but never judges. He prides himself by being the man who will always be there come rain or shine.

The question is…. do you know which guy you are????

———-

I have a session on Saturday 11th Jan, from 3pm till late, in Nairobi. Fee 2k. If you would like to attend please call me 0720229351 for venue details.

———-

I have extended the DvD offer to 20th Jan, instead of 1K per dvd.

You get 2 DvDs:

– A Guide To The Female G-Spot (features squirting) and

– Kamasutra Sexual Positions (sensual love making)

For only Ksh1,500

Read Full Post »

Many people have several theories or rules when it comes to approach. A common question is, are women allowed to make advances towards men…. personally I must ask ‘what century do you live in to ask that question’. I know we live in an African setting but can we not behave like primitive primates, we are civilized ‘I hope’ enlightened people.

Despite many applying some traditional rules about courtship. There is nothing wrong with a woman approaching a man. Yes it is true that some men do not encourage it but don’t go messing it up for other men who gain a certain thrill from being pursued by a woman especially in a club setting.

Here is some reality, have you gone to a certain social venue long enough until you notice the usual ‘feline’ suspects! I am referring to them as feline because just like a Cougar they are normally there to prey on the unsuspecting men. You may ask who are these men…. well they are usually the men that fill tables with alcohol, showing off their wallet ability but they never get much in return if you get my drift.

So in my opinion there is nothing wrong with either gender making the first move. That said, there are things men should stop doing especially on my blog. STOP being so obvious, women know you want the cookie but there are ways of asking for that cookie without using the word ‘fuck’.

Get flirty, get creative with words that paint an erotic scenario. It is all about painting a mental image that will be appealing to the woman, get her curious, lure her, seduce her and just maybe she might give it up like naughty by nature. I hope for your sake that your performance will match your vocal prowess.

If you are a woman and there is a guy you like and you are sure about how you feel about him then do not waste time because female predators are prowling in every corridor and he may be snatched by another so hurry and make that move. I want to be very clear that the 90 day rule is useless. If a man really wants your vagina he will portray and play any character until the day you feel he is worthy thereafter ‘shock on you’ when he stops taking your calls or engaging with you at all even though he was by your side for months. It was an act to secure and gain your trust as your vagina marinated so why not just decide from the onset whether you are having sex with him or not. Prolonging the inevitable is counter productive.

I know people or rather women fear rejection, the truth is there are no guarantees to initiating. So what if he rejects you, there are plenty of fish ‘ask men’, do you know how many times a man has been rejected in his lifetime! What you need to know is that with practice you will get better and you will be able to filter out the probabilities by learning to scout for compatibility and like minded characters. The trick of the trade of courtship is first perform a recce on the person of interest before you begin to open your ‘heart’ to the wrong person. I know it is easier said then done but it does minimize failure.

On a night out, alpha females and males are brilliant at sniffing out and attracting potential ‘shags’ hence why they never worry about getting laid. Unlike the larger pool of society they do not ask when and where will I get laid its just a matter of what time and for how long.

I must highlight that some failures will occur if you do not fit in with the dynamics of a social arena. For instance, do not indulge in a social arena where a certain class of society hang out because you will most likely stick out like a sore thumb. However, ‘blonde’ seductive women can get away with being less exposed because most men out clubbing are not seeking an intelligent vagina. But if you are a man and you do not look the part plus you are on a budget and your ability to interact is lacking the women will notice and will avoid you at all costs. Why is this, its simple, because the women in that establishment only interact with a certain caliber of men. Women love the finer things in life. To the men choose your hunting grounds carefully otherwise you will struggle to maintain a woman who is used to dining at exclusive restaurants, a woman who loves a glass of red wine by the beach, a woman who knows that red wine goes with a tender mushroom pepper steak yet you ordered for mukimu and nyama choma. And guess what, you just flew her there randomly after work.

Ladies the most important thing is that you must put yourself out there. What is rejection, it may hurt at first but so do your heels that you wear in the name of fashion. I know men make it easy by taking rejection and moving on to the next victim but you must take that step to weather the storm and go for what you want before he or she belongs to someone else.

Read Full Post »