mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I have reason to believe my husband is sleeping around with my neighbour’s maid. I know our sex life is and has been dead for a long while but why can’t he play his games with decent women.

Maurice asks,

Are you implying that you have accepted his cheating ways and hoped he would cheat with a certain caliber of woman?

She replies,

Not exactly, no woman wants to know her husband is being unfaithful but at the same time I am aware of something I created long ago.

Maurice asks,

And what is that that you created?

She replies,

We have been married for 8 years, about 4 years ago after our second child I pushed my husband away. Whenever he would make advances I would find an excuse to kill the moment. I did so for a while and for some years he was persistent until one day he stopped initiating. That was 2 years ago. Our sex life went from having sex 6 times a week to once a month or at times we go for months without intimacy.

Maurice replies,

So what you are admitting to is that you believe you pushed your husband away and that is why he is cheating as you allege?

She replies,

Yes I admit I pushed him away even though it does not justify his actions but what I really want to understand from you is why her, she is just a maid, a nobody, she is cheap in every sense of the word.

Maurice replies,

She may be a maid but she is still a woman who I assume has the bodily attributes that stimulate a man visually. What makes you think your husband is cheating?

She replies,

My neighbour’s family joined our family for a Christmas getaway and during that trip my husband conversed with her whenever the opportunity presented itself.

Maurice replies,

I am confused. Your husband was comfortable enough to engage your neighbour’s maid in conversation while the two families were together. Didn’t that look odd to any of you?

She replies,

Ok, maybe I should clarify on something, the maid is actually related to my friend’s husband. She begun working for them after her ambitions for college fell through. She was given a choice to stay and help out with their kids and home or go live with her parents in their rural home.

Maurice replies,

That changes the context, she is family to your neighbour hence why your husband found it appropriate to engage her in conversation.

She replies,

I guess so. I found incriminating texts between her and my husband that suggest steamy moments together but I have not raised the alarm.

Maurice asks,

What do you want to do with the evidence you have and how would you like me to help in this matter?

She replies,

I have read your articles enough to know that confronting him may cause him to go on the defensive and close up. I also know that once a man puts up his defensive wall bringing that wall down can be almost impossible. I am not going anywhere, I am definitely not leaving him, if anything I need to know what I can do to get his attention back. I shared with a friend and she was asking what I am still doing in the relationship after finding out. I am not excusing my husband but I did push him away and the reason I want to stay in this marriage is because he persistent for a very long while before giving up. If I could give him back the woman he married I might have a chance of saving our marriage, most importantly our sexual connection which used to be so strong.

Maurice asks,

Are you and your husband still friends, can you sit down and have a candid talk? Secondly does he know that you blame yourself for your current predicament? I believe that if indeed you want to revive your connection, you must sincerely admit to your husband that you know you pushed him away and that for a long while you know he tried to get your attention but to no avail. If he still has a spark of sexual attraction towards you then you might be able to reignite the flame you once had.

You need to be ready to work for his attention, he may not respond immediately because he may ask himself why now, why the sudden change of sexual climate, will it be short lived, these are all questions that he may likely ask himself. You need to use your feminine side to assure him that the woman he wants was sexually attracted to is back and here to stay. This is not a matter of love, it is a mission to revive the look of lust and sexual craving he once had for you.

She replies,

Thank you so much Maurice. I now have a better idea of what I need to do. And thank you for listening, I will contact you if I need any further advice.