The one day of the year when humans go the extra mile when really what many crave is just a great time that leads to an explosive night (hopefully).
And how does the day go? Lets see.
There will be a meal, and during this meal many will exhaust their thought process, brain cells will be burnt trying to say all the right things, during conversation your academic excellence will not favour you on this day
People will opt to sit in the outdoors pretending they want to enjoy the tropics of our lovely Country but really they are hoping the breeze will limit their sweaty thoughts!
This is what each gender will be thinking…. 1 to 5 mins into the meal….
M: She looks so HOT
W: He is so handsome
M: I like the way she bites into her chicken salad
W: I like a man with an appetite, and I love his dress sense
M: She is so elegant, I love her hair (since when???? rubbish)
W: Gosh he is staring straight into my eyes, wow those brown eyes
10mins into the meal….
M: Look at her lips, glossy, look how she opens wide, I can only imagine ‘him’ in her mouth, ooh does she swallow
W: He is such a good listener only if men were all like him, he is soooo cute
M: The starter was 600/-, her chicken salad is 1,400 yet there was one for 8soc, and there’s dessert coming…. imagine if I had not gone to the ATM
W: Tonight is going to be a great night out, he is going to treat me like the Queen I am, we are going to have drinks, dance and by midnight he will be the sweet gentleman and drop me home
M: Tonight is theeeee niiiiightttt WHAT!!!! I am so tappin’ this…. who’s your daddy, I hope she likes hip hop coz am gonna ridadat riaaadadadadada dat on that ass….
F: He has such good table manners, what a gent, I am liking our conversation, he is clearly educated, my kind of man, I hope he treats me like a gem ‘ can this day not end’
M: She is taking her time eating plus she’s only bitten the chicken twice, she better not be full…. ‘maliza chakula’
W: He is so funny, I love a man with humour
M: We need to be going but I can’t hurry her ‘crap’
30mins later….
W: Shall we….
If your night is not cut short you will experience the next phase:
W: I love his pad, a clean man, too self reliant for my liking but I am sure I will change that soon
M: Well, I have managed to get her home but WFT she wants to play grand theft auto, this part I shall not tell the boys!
W: He is even cuter after the 12 shots I had, and the man has some moves on the dance fall, those are the only moves tonight ‘I hope he knows that’. Tonight I need to be held and in the morning I need to rush and change for work
M: Dear penis, do not let me down tonight, damn her water melons, her succulent nipples ‘fuck me’
W: Look at how macho he is trying to be, those arrrrms, how cute 🙂
M: She is actually kicking my ass on this game, the tables will soon be turned around, let me pour her her last glass of wine
If the night goes as planned good for you.
My readers, as you go about your afternoon today, listen up….
Ladies, embrace your secret garden today, if you are in the office or a home, acquire a private moment, feel your vagina with the tip of your fingers ‘two preferred’, rub that clit, swallow all that saliva that is multiplying as you read this, taste those juices, you know you want to…. let the flow of feel good chemicals in your brain ‘rush within you’
Ladies, take some blueberry, banana, vanilla or coconut yoghurt and smear it around your labia
Men, today might just be your lucky day…. you are the Spanish bull tonight, cut those nails cause this evening your fingers will do most of the talking…. ask her how she wants it, take her through the motions as you follow her instructions to increase or decrease the tempo, give dicky a break and make foreplay the C4 that will induce her first orgasm, and second and so forth….
Lick her and vacuum suck her sooooo good till she forgets her name, and if your name is Tim but she yells Jack just go on…. you are merely taking over from where Jack left off…. remember ‘take your time it’s a vagina not steak’ you left the restaurant ages ago, let her vaginal rim ride the waves of your tongue. Let her blood filled clitoris resemble your thumb
Let her say ‘Oooooooooooh yessssssss babieee that’sssss the spot….
You will not need to ask “baby did you cum”
Just watch her hands, how she suddenly possesses a mighty grib
Stay as you are and let her sink in the deep realms of orgasmania….
And if you tapped it right she will say “baby I lost count”
After that, her gaze will tell you which highway she wants to go on next
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mauricetherapy 
Maurice who are you sticking your teeth into tonight?
And how good are you at this game you write so well about?
And this yoghurt, I have had on many parts of my booty, I wonder could you possibly show me something new?
You are a mystery to many women, your name echos within many hidden groups but I think I will be the one to unveil the masked Maurice
Wanna play with me
matheka we have heard you loud and clear
I like your humour Maurice
Watch out for Njeritherapy she means business
Hehehe Maurice you are nuts. I love the sitting phase ati dear penis lol.
I like blueberry ice cream.
Dude im on a blind date tonight and those rates are not appealing. Ati starter nothing like that, if she picks a starter that is all is she having.
Maurice why don’t you taste my juices for me during the salad that is.
You can come over to my place then I will show you a game called reverse cow girl.
Do you like white chocolate?
@tina..reverse cowgirl is da bomb….am already hard on..then spoon….wacha 2
Hi Maurice. Do people pay to have a talk with you. I need help.
Neema, call me