Dear Maurice,
I need you to shed some light on a situation that has befallen me. I have been dating my girlfriend for 4 years. We met when I moved into the same apartment block 6 years ago. I was then dating someone else but that ended when she flew abroad. After almost 6 years of knowing each other she betrays me.
Maurice replies,
What happened?
He replies, 
When I moved into the same residential block she was then dating some guy who got her pregnant twice and each time he forced her to abort over a period of 3 years. The guy also cheated on her with another girl who lived in the same apartment block. Despite how he mistreated her she was in-love with him and she was very honest about that from the word go. She said when I came along I made her feel safe and loved. We were friends for close to 2 years before we started dating. I should have known better.
Maurice asks,
Why do you say that?
He replies,
Because I have proposed to her twice and she has always wiggled out of accepting my hand in marriage. It has been one excuse after the other but am still here.
Maurice asks,
Why are you still there for her?
He replies,
Because I love her.
Maurice asks,
Why her?
He replies,
It is a feeling that I can’t explain in words, I just breath and live for her. It has been a long journey to reach where we are so I don’t understand why she has made the decision to leave.
Maurice asks,
Where has she gone and what led her to leave?
He replies,
She fell ill and was admitted for 3 weeks. Within that time her ex heard she was sick and paid her a visit which led him to brain washing her into believing he was a changed man and somehow he won her heart back. I can’t make sense of her reaction towards him. Four months after leaving hospital and being by her bedside, she told me to my face that she was leaving me and it was not about me but her. I declined her request to let her go peacefully and dug deeper then she told me that her ex has always been her soul mate. She cut me deep when she admitted that her ex has all along been out of sight but not out of mind. Maurice how can a human being after 4 great years just wake up one day and decide to over turn your World and in the process break your heart. I do not think I can accept any explanation but I want to hear your take on my situation.
Looking back I have given her everything she ever asked for. She always said she was happy and content with me as her man. She has always been my priority above all. I provided for her, I took her out everywhere I went, I bought her a car, I invested in multiple projects in her name and I am currently building what I thought was going to be our home, so why can she make such a sudden move and walk away after 4 years? That idiot never invested in her and he spent most of their relationship feeding off her. How can she settle for less, how can this be possible?
Maurice replies,
Based on what she told you it is clear that she never really moved on from her ex. Unfortunately a loved one can throw at you a scenario that makes no sense what so ever. The truth is, even though many couples can be happy together, there’s always the chance that one person in that relationship was destined to leave one day, the only thing you probably did over the years is slow down the inevitable. There are things in life that are out of our control. It defeats all logic that you have been there for her then she chooses to leave you for the one man who mistreated her. Again, unfortunately for you ‘logic’ in many cases does not apply when it comes to matters of the heart. I am sure you have a million questions and trying to make sense of it all will just stress you so try not to overload your mind.
mauricetherapy 
Are humans destined to be paired up with people who will eventually hurt them. If it is not a man hurting a woman it is a woman hurting a man. What do we really want from each other? Is it really companionship or are we there to consume each other like we do products everyday then when we are done we move our loyalties elsewhere.
I am 41, never been married and I am happy alone though I do mingle with the occasional woman I never make promises I can’t keep neither do I allow women to make promises to me. I guess I would hate to be in this guy’s rut.
Good work Matheka.
I am in the same situation but i have come to realize women don’t like softies, they love rough men
Aw man. Why is the grass green? Why is the sun hot? Why are mats crazy? God created complex and wonderful things that can never be understood fully. He should just move on and be honest with himself. She loves that nigger more than him.
Well said Matheka.
To my brother in ”She Left Me”
Let me speak from my own experience, mine was 22 yrs of marriage, knowing her for 31 years of my life with 3 beautiful kids. I tell you, It is bad enough when a stranger or foe betrays you, but when it is someone you believed to be a close, loved and trusted as a life friend, partner, or spouse, it is especially hurtful. It might feel like you were taken advantage of, deceived, humiliated, despised, cheated, or stabbed in the back. That is exactly how I felt after this long time. It was like I never knew the person I married all these years. Oftentimes it comes as a surprise. That is why it is so painful. You would not expect to be hurt so badly from someone you thought you could trust. So you are left in disbelief, as you are now and unbelievable pain. Atleast she did not go with all you worked hard for, and no kids involved like me. Anyone who has experienced betrayal in a relationship knows how difficult it is to recover from such an experience as it happened to me, now you.. The person you thought you could trust and count on is no longer the person you believed them to be. So you wonder what happened. Were you just wrong about them all along or did something change? Maybe your relationship changed and so did their loyalty to you. Maybe something in either or both of your lives has changed and they became insensitive to you. Or, maybe you both grew apart and in different directions.
There are many reasons that cause people to betray one another. Sometimes they are very deliberate and intended to hurt the other person~as with my case. And sometimes they are consequences of choices that are made with no intention of doing any harm to anyone ~like your case. Looking out for one’s own best interests can cause some people to disregard relationships they once valued ~like her case with me. She may feel the relationship is in the way or not as important anymore. Feelings change. And as feelings change so do one’s actions and choices. An individual that feels their needs are not being met in a relationship might feel that the relationship is no longer important or worth investing in ~be it soul searching, financial, sexual or otherwise a chase for unknown happiness in their lives, or simply a gravitation for the bad boys as in your case. Therefore, they might seek to get their needs met elsewhere. This changes the relationship. Eventually, it grows apart and opportunities for betrayal emerge.
Betrayal is a destructive force that leaves many ruins in its path. Betrayal changes everything. Relationships and all those of us affected will never be the same again. The damage done can be irreparable. Trust is lost. Wounds run deep. Anger persists. Hearts are broken. Self-protective walls are erected. Pain is long and lasting. And we wonder…. Can trust ever be restored? Do wounds ever heal? Will anger cease to exist? Can hearts be repaired? Will the self-protective walls ever come down? Does the pain ever go away? Not only does betrayal change relationships, it changes us. Something happens inside of us. We might find it difficult to ever trust again. We might be more guarded and protective of ourselves for fear of being vulnerable again. We might learn to be more discerning and less naïve. Our expectations of others may change. We may reflect on our own role and responsibility in the relationship and what went wrong. We might try to understand, empathize, and forgive. We may be motivated to grow from the experience and learn more about ourselves and others.
The pain of betrayal is very real and has a significant impact on the lives of all those who have experienced it. It is one of those painful life experiences that have the power to change people’s hearts and lives forever. If you have ever been betrayed, you cannot change what has happened to you or make the pain go away. We need time to grieve and feel angry. We need time to be comforted and encouraged. We also need time to restore our faith in ourselves and others. Betrayal hurts and there is no fast and easy way to heal from its affects. It takes more than time. It takes a heart that will not harden. It takes a commitment to believe in others again. Relationships do change as a result of betrayal; but ultimately, how it changes you is what matters most. You are a better person now because you know what you want in your next relationship. Pick up, recover and restore yourself. You are a better man bro.
Thanks so much for your insight and experience Maurice. “We may be motivated to grow from the experience and learn more about ourselves and others.”
Waaaaaaaaaaaaaa…. U guys enyewe!!!! imma chick but what that lady did to that guy was not cool at all. why the hell was she spending time with you when she knew she would leave in the first chance the other sick bastard came along, said sorry and all the bad things he did went under the bridge. i wish i was her id keep the second guy who stood by her through thick n thin times money or not.