mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I hope you can advise me on the way forward. I am 21 year old. A day before Valentines my girlfriend decided to cheat on me with an older guy who has a family, for the last year we have dumped into him at several social places and she always introduces me to him so I did not think anything of it.

I found out they went to Coast and spent a whole week together. During this whole period she told me she had to travel to shags with her parents for some family thing. So I left it like that and spent Valentines with a few of my single pals.

Maurice asks,

My good man how old is your girlfriend?

He replies,

She just turned 20 in January.

Maurice asks,

How long have you dated?

He replies,

We have been going out for 11 months.

Maurice asks,

In your opinion where was your relationship going or where is it going know that she has cheated?

He replies,

That’s the thing. I know she loves to be pampered and treated out but I can’t afford to splash out like older guys. I’m not broke but I can’t fly her to Mombasa without planning way in advance. I feel I failed her as a man despite what she did to me. I want her to be my wife one day, I hope anyway.

Maurice replies,

My guy, you need to wake up and smell the coffee. You are too young to be dwelling over one girl, you still have a lifetime to experience the good and the bad with young girls who later turn into women. At your stage of life you should play safe, I recommend, but don’t put all your eggs in one basket. If you do not enjoy your youthful years now, you will for sure try to relive those years at a time when you should be more focused in life.

He replies,

But I love her.

Maurice replies,

I hear you bro’ but you will sooner or later cure of that infatuation. I know you don’t want to hear this but you must trust me on this one. You can continue to see this girl because I know you will anyway but be careful she doesn’t push you over the edge then you end up doing something you can’t reverse. I know the loving feeling is sweet and very luring at you age but I urge you to be mentally flexible and even if she leaves for the older guy, don’t worry, there will be plenty more women in your life before you find the one for you. For now, enjoy yourself, mingle and learn from experience, don’t ever give up, the right one will fall into your arms but it could be years from now. And in those years explore with girls, be yourself, have safe sex and again don’t give in and put all your eggs in one basket.

He replies,

But I have forgiven her, I want her back, I know what I need to do to keep her happy.

Maurice replies,

You are not hearing me ‘clearly’. Your girlfriend is not ready to go on the same path as you at the moment. She is only 20, if anything she just turned 20. She is still exploring men, yes its hard to hear this but its the truth. Even if you continue your  deceptive relationship she will most likely let you down again and again. Should you do the same???? No. However, don’t put all your hopes on her. Have your fun but don’t lie to yourself that she is exclusively yours, that will be a futile expectation.