mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I need to pour my heart out to someone and you are one of the few people I know might understand my existing dilemma. I have been married for 9 years and to my shock I thought my marriage was fairly good but my husband’s revelations have confirmed to the contrary. We met in campus, dated for 2 years then drifted apart and rekindled 3 years later.

Maurice replies,

What is your dilemma?

She replies,

My husband has been having an affair with a good friend of mine and with some other side chick. He forgot to log off our shared laptop and I found conversations between him and the two women. I read enough to conclude that they have been seeing each other for over 2 years.

Maurice asks,

Does he know that you know?

She replies,

Yes he does. I confronted him and he did not deny his involvement with both women. He proceeded to tell me that he is glad that he has been caught, he said he was tired of living a double life. I did my best to hide it but I was terrified because it sounded as if he was about to announce that he was leaving me. I could tell in his voice that he was not afraid of me finding out and that made me feel vulnerable. I asked him why would he cheat, and his reply was “you lied to me years ago, we made a pact that if ever we were to get married we would not be sexually conservative like most married people” he added “you have declined all our opportunities to explore our kinky side and have concentrated squarely on your career and family life forgetting that your man needed your undivided attention, so when you failed to deliver I opted for other fruitful avenues”. I asked him, did you have to fuck my friend. He replied, you were the one who fed her information about your short comings and she availed herself , I could not resist her offer. She knew exactly what I wanted and she offered with extra bonuses, deal with it, this is a situation of your own making.

Maurice asks,

Is any of what he is saying true? I can only give you conclusive answers about your dilemma with facts, I cannot answer you based on emotions or morals. Did you make that pact with him and have you neglected him as he implies?

She replies,

Yes, we made that pact. But that was years ago. I did not foresee him remembers words we shared while in campus. He has been consistent in his sexual nature but I thought he would tone down once we caught married. I usually have a 50 hour week and I do stay away from home a lot because of work related schedules but I thought he was content with the sex we occasionally have when I am home and during the two week vacation that we take annually, I thought that would sustain him. I admit I have declined all of his sexual adventures but its because I did not deem it appropriate for us to indulge in our once mutual fantasies within our confines of marriage. Was he justified to take those adulterous actions?

Maurice replies,

In all honesty even I would cheat living under those conditions. Your problems begun when you started having your own perception of what marriage should be and you clearly did not loop or consider your husband’s idea of marriage. Do you know how boring ‘confines of marriage’ sounds. I thank you for accepting your part in these revelations. My job is not to question whether your husband was justified or not, that would be counterproductive, my role is attempt to reconnect you that’s if you are interested?

She replies,

He actually gave him two options, to stay and remodel myself to the woman he thought he was married to or to leave him. He said he is not willing to sacrifice his wants and needs in life to survive in marriage. I can’t afford to lose him.

Maurice replies,

Your husband has basically given you a chance to reignite your lust factor and reconnect not just as a married couple but as ‘boyfriend & girlfriend’ and that is one of the stronger ingredients that matter to keep the juices of lust flowing. In my opinion, a marriage with no lust is a dead marriage of convenience. You need to trace back where you left that open minded girl within you and let her back into your relationship, that’s the girl in marriage not the individual you have become. The problem we face in this continent called Africa, is that we don’t envision marriage as a fun place but have for a long time branded marriage as ‘hard’,’difficult’, using words like ‘compromise & sacrifice’ to justify and cushion the imprisoning features within marriage. If you want to out survive other marriages then you cannot conform to societal norms and unwritten strict rules of marriage.

She replies,

You are right. I need to reintroduce him to the girl he once dated. Maurice, I guess sometimes we readjust and fall into a comfort zone which feels safe but as I have witnessed has its downfalls. I will willingly conform to things that my husband likes and it should be easy because I once wanted the same. I am happy we have chatted but what about my friend, she has no idea I know about her sexual affair with my husband?

Maurice asks,

The question is simple, do you hate her or are you open enough to see past that and engage her on a more positive note? Does your husband’s assortment of desires involve third parties like a threesome or a tribbing voyeur fetish. The reason I ask is because if your husband has already nurtured a connection with her then it is only logical in the realm of sexual preference to involve her. There is a high probability that he will not connect with any other women you may want to involve at this junction, perhaps later. Blatantly omitting her will also make you look sexually insecure and that won’t trigger well in your sexual escapades with your husband. Remember you need to showcase the kinkier you not the vulnerable wife! Plus we don’t even know whether she would like to be party to any of this. Anyway, that’s my professional advice, mine is to share crucial key indicators, what you do from there on is your choice.

She replies,

Wow Maurice, I really appreciate and admire your honesty. It’s now down to me to initiate and show my husband that I still have that naughty girl within me. I just need to find her and have words hehehe. We need to get our man back. Thank you. I will let you know how things go.

Maurice replies,

You are very welcome. If I can help people advance their bond and sexuality I am always game. Please make sure you market me to your friends.

She replies,

I sure will, many need your services. Depending on how things go, would you recommend package 6 for me and hubby, learning to squirt has been on my bucket list I might as well incorporate it into my new sexual journey?

Maurice replies,

First let’s reintroduce your husband to the girl he needs you to be thereafter anything is possible and once you reacquire your sexual bond then we can schedule that session. I have a feeling your husband would be very open to it.

She replies,

Oh, did I not mention he knows you. The other woman he was chatting with shared this article  https://mauricetherapy.com/2016/08/30/threesome-fantasy/  with him and he was extremely open to the content. So I know he will be open to our session with you.

Maurice replies,

That is super. Keep me posted on developments. I wish you the best my dear.

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