mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I met this guy online and we hit it off, we chatted for almost one year keeping regular chats going. My problem is this guy came home for holiday and we had a blast for 5 weeks and now he has gone cold after he got back to the States. Did I do or say something wrong, the last time we spoke just after he arrived back he said he did not want to hurt me in anyway and that he is not sure about putting me through a long distance relationship because he once got hurt when his ex cheated on him.

Maurice asks,

How recent was this?

She replies,

He was in Kenya over the festive season from end of November till 2nd January 2014.

Maurice asks,

It has only been 4 days so why are you jumping the gun so soon?

She replies,

I know its only been a few days but I can tell there is a difference in his tone when we talk over the phone.

Maurice asks,

I need to know a few things about your relationship with this guy. Did you ever label your relationship, are you his girlfriend?

She replies,

No, we never labelled our relationship.

Maurice asks,

Did he call you loving names that would suggest you were his woman and did he make any promises about your future together?

She replies,

Online we would flirt a lot and tease each other, he only called me by my name or sometimes he would refer me as ‘babie’. Actually he liked the phrase ‘whats up babie’. He would compliment me and say sweet things.

Maurice asks,

Was he sexual in his flirt? Did he describe things he would do to you if he ever met you?

She replies,

Yes he was very open when it came to the discussion of sex. He had a way with words that would do things to me. Why do I sense you are trying to imply that this guy just wanted sex from me. I do not believe he could be that kind of a guy after all the effort he put in communicating with me when he could have been chatting a woman nearer him.

Maurice replies,

My dear I am surprised that you are attempting to ignore the obvious. In my opinion it was a holiday fling and now he is trying to play you with the ‘its not you its me’ story. No doubt you must have had fun with him to want to hold onto him but you also need to face the reality of that it was just a fling.

She replies,

Why would he hurt me now so soon after he left. I told him so much about my past and he understood me. Why would a man say he is looking forward to seeing you for 11 months only to dump you after 5 weeks. I know he likes me, he told me things that I cannot share so I know he wants to be with me but because of the distance it complicates things.

Maurice replies,

Based on your response I am puzzled why you asked for my advice. I have dealt with this scenario plenty of times and usually it does not end well if you fantasize over a future that will not be. Have you told him how you feel about him?

She replies,

I told him that I did not plan to but I love him.

Maurice asks,

At what point did you tell him?

She replies,

I told him at the airport. Before he came home I had told him that he was my ideal man because of the way he makes me feel.

Maurice asks,

What was his response, did he return the same sentiment?

She replies,

He would say something like ‘I am glad I make you feel that way’.

Maurice asks,

How old are you both and what does he do in the States? And did he mention a future online or off line?

She replies,

I am 28 and he is 39. He lives and works in the States, he has been there since he was 17. His last words were ‘thank you for an awesome time, I will miss you. I will let you know when I arrive’. No, we did not discuss our future.

Maurice asks,

Does he have kids?

She replies,

He has 2 children from a previous relationship. He did say he wanted to have my babies during pillow talk. Was that a joke?

Maurice replies,

I don’t believe it was a joke but I would like to bet that he said that under some sexual spell. It is common for men to author such words while engaged in a sexual act, more often than not its more of a self ego boost trip, affirming to oneself that they can produce semen which can make you pregnant. The thought is positively stimulating, its when you declare that you are pregnant that the nightmare begins. In short, don’t take a man’s words too seriously when he has an erection.

My advice to you is that you take each day as it comes. You probably scared him with ‘I love you’ but only time will tell what his true intention was or is towards you. Long distance relationships are difficult as it is so in your case without any idea of a mutual future please do not have expectations that may lead you down a path of disappointments. Your communication initiation should not be one sided, if you feel you are initiating chats without much effort from him then that will be a sign that your flame is not burning as bright as it once did. If you find yourself hurting emotionally instead of smiling then you know it is time to cut him loose.

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I have a session on Saturday 11th Jan, from 3pm till late, in Nairobi. Fee 2k. If you would like to attend please call me 0720229351 for venue details.

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You get 2 DvDs:

– A Guide To The Female G-Spot (features squirting) and

– Kamasutra Sexual Positions (sensual love making)

For only Ksh1,500