mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I pray that it is not the end of the road for my marriage. I have been a foolish wife for a while and it’s taken a rift between my husband and I for me to notice that things have really gone downhill. We have only been married for 2 years after dating for just over a year. We are both young professionals with years of opportunities ahead of us but now I fear that I am going to lose my husband.

Maurice asks,

Let’s take one step at a time, what did you do to warrant losing your husband?

She replies,

Over the last year I have been made aware by my husband that I have neglected him in so many ways, he sat me down a week ago and listed all the things that I have said and done to hurt him. I was shocked because he had taken time to note them down. He narrated to me the various scenarios that took place over the year and how I reacted or ignored his opinions. He said that more than once, if anything countless times he attempted to establish cordial dialogue with me but I just ignored him. I then made things worse when I started to go on the defense to try and counter his claims. He then stopped talking and walked away, I know my husband, he never backs down that easily so the minute he did I knew he was hurting. I saw it right there before me and instead of going to comfort him my pride overrode my initial instinct.

Maurice asks,

When you say he walked away what do you mean?

She replies,

Without my knowledge or rather in my ignorance, he packed a few clothes and waiting for morning in the pretext of going to work as usual he never came back that evening. At around 6pm he sent me a text on my phone saying that I should check my mail.

Maurice asks,

So did you?

She replies,

Yes I did. I opened my mail and found what seemed to be an autobiography of all the negatives I had caused that affected him emotionally.

Maurice replies,

So you believe that there is some truth in what he wrote?

She replies,

I read it 4 times looking for something that did not make sense only to find that I was to some degree guilty and had overlooked my conduct towards him and it lead to bruising his ego and denting his status as a man within our home. I take responsibility and I need a solution, how do I get him back home?

Maurice replies,

Firstly, I am glad that you take responsibility; you now need to repeatedly affirm to your husband via mail for now. Whether he response or not the crucial thing is that he receives your sincere apology until he feels that he can trust you, right now you are a negative factor in his life, however his perception of you will change as he regains his manly status and truly believes that you are sorry for neglecting him. Secondly as you mend bridges it will be prudent to discuss how to limit such incidences in the future and forge a mutual bond to never fall in that predicament again.