mauricetherapy

Dear Maurice,

I have been married to my husband for the last 18 years. We have 3 kids, two in high school and one in primary. My husband and I have had our ups and downs like any other marriage and we have survived the trials of life together. After 18 years of marriage I can attest to have married the right man for me, he is a loving husband as he is a loving Dad to our children. However, that said, on my part I live every day for the last 11 years regretting a choice I made and it has slowly eaten away at me and I need your direction on the matter.

Maurice asks,

What seems to be eating away at you?

She replies,

When I conceived our last born it was through an unfaithful period of my life. My husband and I had drifted away and I craved attention else where for a short period of time. I regret it every day, what was I thinking I keep asking myself, whatever was going on between my husband and I was not solved by my actions and yet I went along and had an affair behind his back. I am ashamed of myself. Sometimes I don’t feel like I deserve him.

Maurice replies,

It’s no excuse but human is to error at times. You yielded to your bodily desires despite the consequences and you were wrong to do so. What exactly do you seek from me?

She replies,

I keep asking myself if I should tell my husband the truth, will he still accept me as his wife after learning he has been raising another man’s child as his own? I feel that he would leave me, ask for a divorce, I would have disgraced my entire family and I don’t think I could live with that.

Maurice asks,

So you are sure that your husband would leave you?

She replies,

Yes he would. In the past he has had out bursts in anger and mentioned that if he ever found out that I had been unfaithful, he would throw me out and take custody of the children.

Maurice asks,

Does the biological father know about his child?

She replies,

No. If he knew he would expose us.

Maurice asks,

Why do you say so?

She replies,

Because he is my husband’s second cousin, they are related by blood and they are both proud stubborn men. That’s the other issue. Doesn’t my last born deserve to know his real father?

Maurice replies,

Apart from your guilt trip, if you can attest to having a great husband and that your marriage is intact then I personally do not see why you should open up a can of worms that will only most likely go against you. It’s up to you at the end of the day but I do not see any reason to complicate matters. This is one secret that you must take to your grave. Your children already have a Dad, anyone can be a father but it takes effort and love to be a Dad, a father figure in a household. Your husband is clearly a good Dad so don’t take that away from your children. Let this be a lesson to you that choices have consequences. Enjoy your marriage and let go of the past.