mauricetherapy

  Dear Maurice,

I have a problem that needs your urgent attention. I have been married for 4 years 3 months now however if you total the time spend together, we have practically seen each other for 112 days per year, give or take a day or two. Personally it’s reached that point where I feel like letting him go. Don’t get me wrong, I love him, he treats me well and I have everything a man should provide for his woman but I am lacking companionship.

Maurice asks,

It’s taken you 4 years to realize there’s a problem! Anyway, why is it that you only see each other for roughly 4 months of the year?

She replies,

To be honest its taken 4 years because over that period I had his vacation to look forward to plus the perks that came with our being alone were a distraction. We always skype-d everyday and I was content with that arrangement. My husband works in the Middle East and has done so for the last 6 years. He is on a very lucrative package that keeps me busy if you know what I mean? He only gets the 4 months as his leave instead of the work for one month and receive a month off policy. The one month off policy drove me nuts. I would rather the accumulated vacation time.

Maurice comments,

So you sacrificed 2 months of his ‘off time’ and opted for the 4 months instead of 6 months? I must ask, are you truly in-love with you husband? And if so after all this time why are you not with him?

She replies,

Yes I do love him and yes I am in-love with him. When we met he had already landed the job which did not allow for a spouse to join her husband. He has tried everything to get me over there but the company policy plus his contract stipulate those terms however HR are attempting to change their policy but it takes time.

Maurice asks,

I need you to be frank with me, have you strayed or has he?

She replies,

I know for sure he hasn’t strayed. First he is in the middle of nowhere; they don’t have entertainment areas near where he works. There company has in-house state of the art sport facilities and video gaming for those who want to entertain them selves. Considering the salary he is on it’s worth the sacrifice.

Maurice asks,

So have you strayed considering your evasive answer? And is the money worth being apart?

She replies,

Please don’t critic me. I made one error of judgment a few years ago and had an affair for 8 months but I ended it when I realised I had the man for me despite our distance.

Maurice asks,

Between the two of you, in your opinion, who makes contact first when you are skyping or through our social media platforms?

She replies,

I guess he does but that’s only because I can’t contact him while on shift, as I said his company is strict when he clocks off he alerts me to go online so we can chat.

Maurice asks,

What do you do for a living?

She replies,

I am a house wife and a run a boutique. Why?

Maurice comments,

My dear I’m assuming you wanted my candid analysis so let’s look at the facts. You have a loving rich man who pampers you from here to Kingdom come, I applaud him for that. If his pockets can allow then let him splash out, after all you’re his wife. However, you had an affair of which I am pretty confident you never told him about and probably will never, at this point it’s not my place to tell you whether to tell him or not. If status quo works for you then so be it. I believe you love your husband and due to time spent apart you grew out of the in-love sphere hence the adultery. You say, you had this affair a few years ago and yet knowing how most women reply to certain questions. You chose those words ‘a few years’ out of guilt, not wanting to relive the time in your mind. I am not judging you but you must admit if you knew he was having an affair you would want an explanation among other demands that come with receiving bad news. If your marriage has a chance to work it has to be based on more than Skype, more than the 4 months a year and definitely more about your bond not the bond that comes from the money he earns. Long distance relationships are not easy and personally I would never go down that path unless I knew the probability of relocating together was guaranteed. I want you to take a step back and review your marriage ’why are you really in the marriage’ before you subconsciously drift apart.